Courtship Chemistry

So as promised, here is your follow up to 'You "Type" is More Mind Than Media'. I'm calling it "What Women Want." It really should be called "what women are biologically programed to think they need," but that's not a very catchy title.

Men typically are not very good at sending or receiving the signals used in the courtship ritual. The book The Definitive Book of Body Language states, "women not only control the game and make the rules, they own the scoreboard." In the animal kingdom, the male of a species tend to be more colorful and use flashy, and sometimes absurd rituals to attract a female mate. For humans, the primary displays that men use is their power, wealth, and status. In lieu of dressing sensually, or wearing makeup, men will rev their car engine, brag about their salaries, and challenge other men which, in most cases, isn't very effective. Still, they do subconsciously send out other signals that encourages attraction in either direction.

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Similar to women, men display preening behavior in the presence of the opposite sex. Today, more than ever, men are spending more time and money on personal grooming. This behavior may manifest itself as him straightening his tie, touching his cufflinks or watch, and rearranging his shirt, coat, or other clothing. But the most direct sexual display a man can make is the 'Thumb-in-Belt' gesture that highlights his crotch. This may be combined with turning his body to her, use of an intimate gaze and holding that gaze for longer than usual. When sitting or standing a man may spread his legs to not only display his crotch, but to take up more of the space to seem bigger and more dominating. Much to the dismay of women, men will also use crotch adjustments to assert masculinity in front of others. This is especially true on sporting teams or other groups that encourage macho attitudes.

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As for what women are attracted to, in general women prefer men with a deeper voice, athletic body shape, broad shoulders, muscular chest and arms, and a tight butt. Just like men, women fall into three distinct categories for what parts of a man's body they are most attracted to: chest/arms, butts, and legs.

Chest/Arms

Men have a distinct upside-down-triangle shape, which is opposite of the women's right-side-up body shape. Sexy, as defined by the book and blog, is the distinction between the sexes so a man who has broad shoulder is highlighting this difference. These features evolved to allow them to carry weapons and food over long distances. The male chest developed to house large lungs to allow for better breathing when running and chasing. In past generations, and in many animal species, the bigger the man's chest, the more power he has in a group.

^{There is such a thing as too much muscle though; it makes a woman think you care more about your appearance than theirs.}

Butt

Surprisingly, butts are considered the favorite part of a man's body with 40% of the votes. But I bet many women don't know why. Women are attracted to a small, tight butt because it's a sign that the man can make the necessary forward thrusting motion needed for reproduction.

Legs

Back to the triangle- the ideal man's body has broad shoulders and narrow hips with muscular legs. It's not that women are actually attracted to the legs, as much as they are attracted to the symbol of power and endurance that they display. According to Dr. Devendra Singh, women find male hips with a 90% waist-to-hip ratio the most appealing.

This book also gives men a sneaky hint that, even as a woman, I admit to be true. If a man wants to find out which women find him attractive, he should wear his tie a little to one side. A woman who thinks you're good looking can't resist straightening it out for you.

Resources

Pease, Allan, and Barbara Pease. The Definitive Book of Body Language. New York: Bantam, 2006. Print.