Can't help you with exactly what you're after (to me Excel's radar doesn't appear to do what you want). However you can try a Bubble chart - it's perhaps the closest within Excel.

It gives you your data on an x,y graph but the magnitude of the second variable (which you had as distance from origin) is given by the size of the data point itself.

So your data will look like 4 floating bubbles - not quite the elegant solution you were after, but you get visual comparison between variables.

... but your solution has to be possible in Excel ... still thinking ...