Cat Toast Swirls

OK, now I have to get a cat.

Would this work with English muffins (which I prefer to toast)? And what's so English about these muffins, anyway? Some sources say they originated in Wales, some say Victorian England, some say a certain Sam Thomas invented them in the U.S.

Anybody know? Dough anybody care?

I'll send you one of my cats.

As far as the muffin, i doughn't know.

Being in the Southern U.S., I have to wonder if cornbread will work? If so, then would muffins, pie-shaped slices, square/rectangular or cornbread sticks be appropriate choices?

Also, would pure butter or some of the man made death dealing artificial stuff be best?

If you add jam, jelly, preserves, honey or molasses, can the damping affect of said substance be calculated? Would it require a differential equation?

How about a scone? Would that work? If you added clotted cream, what deviation from optimum performance could we expect?

Oh, so many questions, so little time!

These are all excellent questions worthy of experimentation. Someone with a cat, an engineering degree, and a head for calculations is going to have to get on this right away. I suggest someone apply for federal stimulus funds to support this. Cornbread, scones, crumpets....And would white bread prove more or less aerodynamic than wheat or rye? Jam, preserves, honey....And what kind of cat???? This research could go on for years.

"wonder if cornbread will work"? NO! Cornbread will not support the G loading. It will fly apart in a shower of cornbread crumbs, all over the _kitchen lab.

This is strange. I would have put the toast with the butter side up and dropped the both of them off of the highest place near by. I believe they would have started to spin, swapping which would land as proverbally stated, thus creating purr-pet-oleo motion..

Good one.