Caption This for 03/27/15

Always use reputable tradesmen, some will use and install any old thing to save money.

I thought you said "put it in reverse and floor it!"......No, I said put it in reverse and store it.....

That's the second time this month, what is it with red cars and roofs???

You know I used to be a pilot......

Just dropping in to see how everything is going?

Well at least it wasn't a red Cavalier!

The airdrop didn't go as planned...

It was an Amazon order by drone gone bad. ;-)

The first flying car crash!!!!!

PSA: Driving when you are 'high' is just as dangerous as drunk driving!

I wonder if this happened in Colorado.....

Valet parking at the stunt driver's academy could be challenging!

When adding on the items I wanted in the option package for my new van, I'm sure I checked on the box for the roof rack. Not the box for the roof wreck.

Installation art.

House built around historical local relic.

You can't park there - there's a double yellow line.

"I'm sorry, I don't understand what you're saying, your French accent is atrocious."

When they said the automated parking means you can park the car with your eyes shut - they forgot to say that feature is not finished yet.

What an odd design for a multi-storey car park...

Hi fellas, we found another glitch in our driver-less car software.

Arrg! you beat me to the 'women drivers' jab.

I was going to do the classic (if dated and slightly sexist) "Honey, I promise I won't get mad, just tell me HOW you managed to get it up there?"

UREKA-After following the link and reading the news on post 36, it is no longer a "jab"

Yeah, but now it feels uncomfortable, like telling a Jewish joke to somebody sitting next to you in a dark theater, and then seeing the yamaka on his head when you both walk out into the lobby.

Hit that speed bump a little fast!

Failed DRONE experiment?

Well, the salesman did say prices were falling!

Officer: "So what happened here?"

Driver: "I don't know, I was driving along, minding my own business and ...... BAM! .... I'm on top of someone's roof.

Officer: "Really?"

Driver: "I think it was a tornado."

This doesn't look like the typical 'new user needs help' post we see around here, the grammar is too good. It needs more misspellings and missing articles and conjunctions.

When it looks like a five-year old writing in a combination of Leet and the 'Engrish' used by actors trying to pass off as 'Chinamen' in the '30s pulp movies, THEN it will look like an authentic post.

sorey. I try bettr necst tim

Autonomous car test.

Well was doing find until it made a right turn off the bridge. I guess we have a few more bugs to work out.

Heading for the top of the world, but made a rest stop first?

Was just wondering how it got there and found this.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/picturegalleries/8711199/Embarrassing-car-crashes-and-road-accidents-in-pictures.html?image=1

You didn't include the complete sentence. "....... with the front end wedged in an iron bath which broke the fall and stopped the Fiat Panda plunging further into the house." Which just goes to show that an iron bath tub cannot be broken, no matter what one tries.

Unfortunately, this now classic post was deleted just prior to my joining CR4. I would love to see the complete transcript.

Wait, so it really WAS a woman driver who did this (by forgetting to set the parking brake on a hillside)?

Stereotype reinforced.

The first flying Panda just wanted to use the bathroom.... And couldn't wait in line!

How on Earth did the car land in there backwards? Bathbreaking attempt failed!

That's it! At last! The final post to the bath breaking technique.

The beast can not die !

Officer to driver

Ok, let me get this straight, A house hit you?

Dammed Google Maps!

1 uncalibrated GPS + 1 all wheel drive vehicle = many funny 'Caption This' photos.

Well Boss, it finally happened. The car beat the skydivers to the ground so we didn't have a chute deployment this time. We missed the dealership by at least 1 block and 4 floors.

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Version 1.0

New "air ride system" failure.

Now I know we were booked at the "Red Roof Inn" but this isn't what I had in mind.....

Professor to his assistant: "Let that be a lesson to you, Never put Flubber in your gas tank and than run the tank empty."

Well I pre-ordered the aeromobile. Easy to take off but no one told me how to land it. Where in the driver's handbook can I find that information?

Scuse me, I wanna use your phone, mine flew out of my hand when I when I was texting. If that bartender hadn't kicked me out, this wouldn't have happend! *hick*.

I could just see 'the Orangutang' pulling just such a stunt, with enough 'plausible deniability' ("I lost control, honest!") to throw all the liability onto the show and their insurance underwriter.

Clarkson would be the only one who would even consider it, as it would be beyond Hammond (not enough backbone to leave the show with a final F-U, plus he has enough trouble seeing over the steering wheel as is) or James May (not enough wit to leave in a dramatic display of 'sour grapes')⁽¹⁾.

Notes:

1. It should be noted that the previous comments are based on the CHARACTERS the three hosts play on the series, which are comic exaggerations of their normal personalities, just as Steven Colbert, the CHARACTER is different from Steven Colbert, the ACTOR who plays the Steven Colbert character on TV. I mean no disrespect to any of the previously mentioned three four gentlemen⁽²⁾.
2. Although if Clarkson want's to continue playing 'gruff curmudgeon' characters, I would recommend that we watch some Ed O'Neal shows, he should try to be a bit more like Al Bundy, comically crude while avoiding any racial or ethnic slanders.
   

Clarkson has 'jumper his shark'. Funny to a point, but it then no longer works.

Yeah, he's jumped the shark, and got bit in the behind for his trouble.

If he keeps up with the same abrasive onscreen/offscreen persona, nobody will want him around, and if he 'mellows out,' people will say he's 'lost his edge,' that he's 'washed out'/'burned out' and not hire him.

I LOVE Top Gear, and I hope they can find a replacement 'top stooge' to complete the trio. Clarkson, Hammond and May were like a British, understated Howard, Fine and Howard, with Clarkson as the 'Moe.' You always need a 'Boss' or 'Top Stooge' to order around the other stooges. The shitck just does not work without a clear leader, and neither 'The Hamster" nor "Captain Slow" have enough respect/authority to really lead the other. "The Orangutang" managed to be the leader by sheer mass: he was the biggest and loudest. They can't just get another 'big brute' to lead, or people will think he's 'just another Clarkson.' No, the BBC has to go a different route, the new Top Stooge for Top Gear needs to be clever, witty, cunning, leading by brains instead of brawn, and above all else, have a great love of cars ... I wonder if Rowan Akonson (If I could ever spell Mr. Bean's last name correctly) is looking for work.

Or would that end up becoming 'Blackadder Shifts Gears,' with May becoming the new Percy and Hammond becoming the new Baldrick?

Upcoming elections - they're all acting PC and self rightious.

Oh please, it's supposed to be 'stiff upper lip,'not 'stick stuck up in the other end.'

All PC and Self Rightious? What, are they TRYING to hand the country over to the Official Monster Raving Loony Party? Then again, would it be a bad thing if the OMRLP were running the place?

We MUST find a better roof tile strength test!

Husband to wife "I wish your mother wouldn't just drop in like this"

Honest ! First time we tested the levitation device the car really did lift an inch off the ground ! We are going to set it on full strength this time and try again

Hey, What is the co-efficient for impacttest.?

DHAYANANDHAN.S

48. Maria Rizzo, 34, parked her car on a street to admire the beautiful view above this house in Alassio in northern Italy but she forgot to put on the handbrake in an eagerness to take a picture. The Fiat Panda ended up rolling off the street into the roof of this house. Luckily, no one was home, so no one was hurt.

When asked for comment, Santa said: "This was a mistake. I'm going back to the sleigh and reindeer."

Hello. (woman on phone) When we had the new roof installed last year, you gave us a 25 year warranty on leaks. Can you tell me if there are any exclusions in the fine print?

Sara, we need to go over your parking lesson again!