Scientist Designs Program to Translate Alien Languages

I would imagine any aliens smart enough to come to earth, would have already been listening to our radio broadcasts and deciphered our language by the time they got here.

Its a good thing too, because any software that compares known human languages to figure out an alien one is not that likely to work unless the aliens are very similar to humans.

"I would imagine any aliens smart enough to come to earth, would have already been listening to our radio broadcasts..."

And that is precisely what prevents them from contatcting us.

What I really meant was smart enough to have developed the technology to enable them to come to earth. If they are smart tho they may stay away from earth.

It seems to me that the reasoning behind this invention is flawed.

But fine, let us give him a simple test. Take his software to the nearest aquarium where there are whales, dolphins, etc. and let it divine the structure of their languages by comparing them to human ones.

IMHO, aliens wouldn't just land and start saying "Blark mooble d'linka blark!" at us.

Assuming their motives were peaceful, they'd work with us to establish a simplified common language. Starting first on simple math concepts, then using those to expand on to physical objects, situations, etc. Here's a logical progression:

• 1+1=2 | 1+1=2=Yes | 1+1=1=No
• Earth + Humans = Yes | Earth + Humans + Aliens = Yes | Earth + Aliens - Humans = No
• Yes, you can date my sister but I don't want to hear any kinky details.

See? It's pretty easy.

Of course if their motives aren't peaceful then I expect they'd let us know in other ways. And there's little chance we could do much in the way of negotation anyway.

Does it work on Cat or Dolphin?
... didn't think so...
Del

Good point. It's fairly obvious that dolphins are intelligent and that they communicate. It should be able to translate what they're saying (probably 'thanks for all the fish'), or make sense of a sentence spoken in french.

However, it may be that they aren't going to be speaking to us, but about us, as in 'they should be harvested now before their numbers start dropping'.

Ever wonder why all the ancient laws are aimed at keeping humans healthy and multiplying? It could be that the Bible is the first documented case of artificial insemination and that we are no different than shrimp being farmed in ponds in the Arizona desert.

What are they going to base their translators on. . . . there is no sample....no rosetta stone . . . . to build the algorithm. The one thing that will become of it is code breaking

"Ack, Ack, Ack, Ack"

Martian Translator Device: Don't run! We are your friends!
Martian Translator Device: We come in peace! We come in peace!

Martian speech impediment.

The issue may be irrelevant - they could be on route and thinking, "How shall we cook the harvest ?". If my understanding is correct, advance forces have already tested a lot of people for kebability.

whut the sam hill is "kebability" ~~~ an' regarding thet thar hyperlink attached to yer period: "Gettin' Probed by Aliens Ain't No Laughing Matter" ... who the heck is Dale Masterson...?

This is flagrant shishkebobbery! I'll never eat in that restaurant again! No hehuateing sauce either!

- It's one of those evolved words, more correct to spell it "kebabability". As for poor Dale, it's highly unlikely he remembers exactly what his name his name is, and I'd be surrpised if he rolled over for a ciggy afterwards.

Unless there's an immediate in-depth probe it sounds like the bends for him.

Agggr acclespur ftzz prignst burble noshft buckettangle blobgrobbet.

Mr A. N. Alien (BsC)

Speelcheck indicates buckettangle to be a pre-noun.

OK, so this software is based on 60 different human languages. I think it is obvious that no alien language is likely to bear sufficient resemblance to any of the 60 samples for this to be useful. It may have application in Earthly translations, possibly even cryptology, but UFO pilot-speak? Frammarazzitz!

I'd like to hear his take on Motorhead. He appears to have an advantage.

Are those two photos of the same bloke? Talk about non-verbal communication!

Has Navajo been identified yet? Basque is another.

Can't make heads or tails out of the archaeo-languages experts. Seems every one of them has a differrent take on the subject.

Apparently they don't communicate well amongst themselves. How does one pronounce...

When they start spouting Neandertal at me, maybe I'll listen (and maybe I won't!).

How does one pronounce...

I'd say the visual goes beyond mere words....or started (begat?) them anyway.

What've you got against Neanderthal? Most everybody speaks it these days. Even the edjudicated 1's.

"What've you got against Neanderthal?"

Nothing at all. But anyone claiming to speak it must first introduce me to their teacher... http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/12/081209221750.htm

If we don't understand bees, we've got bog all chance with ET.

Right - what's to say the aliens that we first meet up with (here OR there) will even do speech? They may communicate through dance, eyeball tentacle twisting, scent, (consider the implications of flatulence) or direct mental imagery. Perhaps a method we can't even conceive of. Translate that!

The tin-foil prophylactic hat stops them ******g with my head ! Those cave-dudes weren't trepanning themselves to let out demons or pressure.

What WERE they doing it for then? Amusement?!? Right - stamps hadn't been invented yet, so philately was right out, let's see what's inside Ogg's noggin then! Check out this: http://zapatopi.net/afdb/