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India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/01/2015 9:59 AM

Perhaps I'm oversimplifying things here, but if cables are getting chewed on, and chemical deterents cannot be used (because nobody in India wants to hurt a monkey) why not just run the cables through metal conduit? The monkeys won't try to chew through THAT.

http://www.electronicproducts.com/Multimedia/Telecom/Animals_vs_Technology_India_s_18bn_IT_plan_in_question_as_monkeys_won_t_stop_feasting_on_country_s_data_cables.aspx

(I also appologize if this is the wrong forum, but 'citywide IT' seems more like a Civil Engineering issue than a Networking issue, both from the scale and from the obstacles encountered.)

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#1

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/01/2015 10:29 AM

We have IT issues with monkeys and we are not allowed to hurt the monkeys. Oh, sorry, you are talking about something different.

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#2

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/01/2015 10:51 AM

Birth control for monkeys....?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/11/18/monkey-birth-control-india_n_4297613.html

Sure wouldn't be a problem here....we'd teach them to hunt each other....

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#3

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/01/2015 11:38 AM

To curtail the animosity the monkeys have with the systems, you could give the monkeys their own cell phones.

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#7
In reply to #3

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 12:11 AM

Give them either, typewriters (the old type), or video games (the new type)..I am sure they will fall into the same psychotic patterns that many of our citizens are currently under the influence of….

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#4

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/01/2015 12:45 PM

Ger your mouth off that cable YOU DIRTY STINKING APE!

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#5

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/01/2015 6:43 PM

This is not a technical issue.

It is one of culture and religion clashing with technological advancement, in a country too poor to cope with the demands already placed on their almost non-existent infrastructure.

There are more fundamental issues that demand resolution before giving a cell phone to everyone or connecting them to the internet.

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#6

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/01/2015 6:48 PM

Monkeys are probably chewing the isolation from the cables because they are hungry or bored... it will probably be much cheaper to hire an Ethologist rather than rewiring an entire subcontinent!

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#8

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 1:56 AM

Please redirect the monkeys to the IT connection of kilsanjuriya and other spammers.

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#9

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 7:23 AM

In India we worship Monkeys, Cows, Elephants, and all the animals who balance the nature or contribute to human life. Recently in Maharashtra, Govt. has banned slaughtering of cows, which is considered as goddess. It gives milk to children from milk you get butter, curd, butter milk, ghee (fat for cooking), its dung is used as fuel in villages. Sorry the beef eaters are denied beef so the McDonald burger.

As regards to cables for IT industry, these should be enclosed in conduits why hanging loose in the streets?. It is faulty installation. In building where I stay rats chewed up elevator cables, we have now enclosed them in flexible conduit so no problem now.

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#10
In reply to #9

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 10:10 AM

Well plants contribute oxygen,,,,soooo....

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#19
In reply to #10

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 7:11 AM

You are right Solar, Our people also pray Banyan tree which gives lot of oxygen in day time. Hindus will never cut Banyan tree as it is considered unholy to cut Banyan tree. We Indians respect nature and pray anything which sustains life.

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#20
In reply to #19

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 9:24 AM

Who decides what can be eaten and what can't??? How is this decision made?

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#36
In reply to #20

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 1:16 AM

These decisions are ancient decisions taken by our holy priests. Followed since ages.

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#66
In reply to #36

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 12:23 PM

I'll take that as an "I don't know."

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#92
In reply to #66

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/12/2015 12:49 AM

It is written in Vedas.

Gajanan Phadte

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#80
In reply to #36

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 7:52 AM

Perhaps that means that many people cant think for themselves. Failing to adapt to a changing environment, be it a different or just changing, then the species will die. Please read Darwin on natural selection.

"Followed since ages", and nobody every questioned this?

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#38
In reply to #19

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 7:01 AM

pray anything which sustains life.Like my AR-15?

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#11

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 6:04 PM

Let's guess what Audrey II might say....

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#13
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 7:19 PM
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#12

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 7:09 PM

The future is crowded.

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#14

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 7:55 PM

Maybe the monkeys behavior can be modified in the same way electronic collars are with dogs in using an invisible barrier fence.

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#15
In reply to #14

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 8:11 PM

That would cause the animal distress. Not allowed.

I was raised on a farm in the south. We butchered hogs, goats, chickens and beef cattle for food.

We.shot stray dogs that distressed our cattle.

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#30
In reply to #15

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 7:38 PM

South of what ? Did shooting the dogs distress the dogs ?

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#31
In reply to #15

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 7:40 PM

South of what ? Did the dogs get distressed when they were shot ?

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#44
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 2:36 PM

We have an evil dog in our neighborhood that likes killing the "at-large" cats that hang out inside our garage at times, and other times just in our yard. Two cats in one month, possibly three now. It appears to be a largish white dog, short-ish hair, long snout, tail docked.

My wife is very determined to kill this dog. I am thinking why stop at the dog? Why not hunt down the owners, and remove them from the picture as well, they are the responsible ones, after all. Not that I really condone killing human beings, but some of these so-called people, really make me wonder if they possess an ounce of humanity.

Next step: snare contraption, don't worry no police or animal control will be harmed in the making of this movie. There may be dogs hanging in space, though, twisting, slowly, slowly in the wind. The problem with today's world, there is no Roman Empire to get all ticked off and crucify tens of people a day, until they get the answer they want - Roman Governors of the Provinces - the original terrorists.

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#46
In reply to #44

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 8:24 PM

You live in Lubbock. I have to think that you have the means to dispatch the offending animal.

If you don't want to handle it, I can call one of my cousins. They'll solve the problem for you.

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#48
In reply to #46

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 9:13 AM

Thanks, Lyn. I think we have it covered. Wife is a pistol-packin' mama. She loves all animals, except this one dog, and she has blood in her eye for this dog.

Animal services (meaning - euthanasia experts) have provided a "Have-a-Heart" trap for this dog, chained to our front porch fence. Wife says she has no intention of letting the dog off that easy. I am thinking we are talking a minimum of DIA style water-boarding, carpet party, pokes in the eyes with sharp sticks, toothpicks in the food, and any number of other "stimuli" for this dog. Thank God at least she is mad at something else other than me at this time.

We may actually return this dog to its "owners", in not so great a condition, and let them have to deal with it. If the "owners" want trouble, we will provide. We are angry people and need targets.

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#47
In reply to #44

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 6:44 AM

Why not hunt down the owners, and remove them from the picture as well, they are the responsible ones, after all
(But your Honor, he needed killin)

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#51
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 9:37 AM

Yesterday, if you had asked me this (and you did), I would have said, "If I can backtrack to the so-called "owners" of this dog, there will be hell to pay, and if I had found them yesterday, I would not have hesitated to drop them where they stood. Is that clear enough for you? People like that should be replaced by monkeys. At least monkeys have a code, of sorts.

Today, I might let them live. Tomorrow, I will be focused on keeping my wife from doing something to this dog that will land her butt in jail, she is still giving off super-critical steam from her forehead, even with the rains that came all night last night.

I think we need more citizen volunteers to catch stray animals, and if there is a reward on them, bring the ears of the animal to the people who were harmed by its actions. Most dogs know what is OK, and what is not OK. A killer is a killer is a killer, when they do it for "sport" or no reason.

A man who feels that he is surrounded by amoral idiots who create chaos, endanger his family, endanger small children (that live in our neighborhood), and endanger our beloved pets, and who feels that he has retreated to the last confines, has little choice but to go on the warpath. I am ready to paint my horse, are you?

Hell and death are coming, O ye pernicious ones. Drop to your knees and pray to whatever you call your gods, but they will not answer you, for they are made of wood and stone, and are false. Hell and death are coming for you, brood of iniquity, make clear the path, for the white buffalo, and the Great Spirit, and the pale horse is coming. You cannot stop it. You need not try. Accept that your fate is sealed, O ye evil murderers of innocent women, children, and captives, your time awaits you, and your days are counted and dwindling down to nothing. Hell is coming for you, and demands payment, O ye wicked, repent, and obtain for yourselves white garments, that the pale rider may pass you by for now.

OK, I have said my peace, and my coffee demands that I de-caffeinate.

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#49
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 9:24 AM

Distressed cattle makes for some really tough steaks. We worshipped our cattle, treated them well, watered them, fed them, and only selected the best one for locker beef, and we thanked the steer/heifer for their sacrifice to nourish our family. This is the way that is right. God gave mankind dominion over the animals (that means responsibility, not just power).

Our dogs knew better than to go running all over the countryside. They stayed near home, because they knew that is where the good stuff was. They guarded our chickens, cattle, and kept snakes away. They watched our backs, and we had their backs. They never ever got sick, and never came indoors, except during the worst storms. No strangers ever dared present any danger to us while these dogs were living and breathing. Even the hired help knew not to test the dogs patience.

On the other hand, when an animal gets a taste for random killing of smaller weaker animals, there is nothing short of a bullet that will stop it. Local firearms ordinance or not, it is the law of the west. Do not tread on me.

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#16

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/02/2015 8:56 PM

Maybe you could just clip their wings...

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#17

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 6:05 AM

Mr. Sharma has briefly explained about the cultural diversity of India. Unity in diversity is the fundamental idea which keeps India as the largest democratic country in the world. Ideal solution to sort out this type of problem is to install cables through conduits and technical specifications of the contract to be modified accordingly.

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#18
In reply to #17

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 6:32 AM

Thx Swamy, I appreciate your views.

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#85
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 12:31 PM

If the people of India were equipped with high compression air rifles (don't know if they want actual firearms which would function much better), they could remove the monkeys easily, and eat all the monkey meat they want (I think it unclean to eat monkey meat, but that is my personal preference). For all I know BBQ monkey could be pretty good. You would think that with all monkeys playing around in the overhead wires, there would be more than a few that get "nuked". Is microwave monkey tasty?

Andy G probably eats his own monkey raw.

Has anyone in India ever seen a New Mexico road lizzard? Same thing as sand lizzard, but this runs very fast down the highway with a stick in his mouth. When the hot tar starts to burn his feet, he sticks the stick down into it pointing vertical, and climbs up thereupon until he finds his relief!

Make the wires a bit hotter, and the monkeys will let go (paint them flat black). Maybe then they will get lead poisoning since you flinch at giving them payment in lead for their evil deeds.

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#86
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/10/2015 8:23 AM

Indians never eat monkey meat. Let the problem of damage to cables be our problem and our people will solve it. Thanks all of you.

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#87
In reply to #86

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/10/2015 11:45 PM

Don't take these extreme suggestions and cultural put downs personally Suresh. It is directed for fun not to spite (right fellas?!!!!)

Some of the replies did invoke a cringe from me.

India isn't the only place with monkey or other critter issues.

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#96
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/12/2015 3:30 PM

sorry about the induced cringing, but it was only intended as good humor for us all. I imagine really that eating monkey meat is forbidden in all cultures....or not.

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#98
In reply to #86

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/13/2015 12:21 AM

Life is more precious than any material.

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#21

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 10:10 AM

You could give people the job of convincing the monkeys not to chew on the insulation through gentle persuasion and beat these people with a stick if this fails.

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#22
In reply to #21

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 10:28 AM

Thanks for that.

My wife thinks I'm crazy, sitting here at my laptop, in my underwear, laughing at the screen.

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#23
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 11:09 AM

Your welcome. I can't help getting this vision of so many people crowded together that it begins to become one of a hive of bees where any outside stimulation causes a ripple effect, sending waves of reaction through the colony. An example is the appearance of cell phones at a riot. I can't say wether this is good or bad, I'm just saying.......

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#40
In reply to #22

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 9:10 AM

Thank you for that mental image. Now if you'll pardon me, I need to get some brain bleach and scour that from my memory...

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#24
In reply to #21

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 11:09 AM

It would seem we already have an experienced group of beaters....

The Indian police, who think protest against rape is a beatable offense....

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#25

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 3:07 PM

And also when more than 500 million of non Hinduism want to slaughter a cow to eat the meat that is offence .and i don't know what about throw the bodies of dead human in the mean rivers . yet i don't know what meat the Hindu dose eat if they want

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#27
In reply to #25

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 3:57 PM

Since you are from Iraq, I assume you are not Hindu.

So, are you speaking for the Hindu religion, the cows or the dead humans?

[old salt: "coat the cables with rat poisoning or cyanide" is not an option]

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#28
In reply to #27

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 7:10 PM

I was expecting an Indian citizen from this forum who first who has a right to reply but i see you are in rush . and you don't have the right to tell what others what should they say or shouldn't "the cows or the dead humans" what i meant the offence . like the others did mention . "old salt ,Cyanide,is not an option"

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#29
In reply to #28

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 7:19 PM

On second thought, Cyanide probably wouldn't be an option unless the cables had MSDS's attached to them or posted on the towers.

Instead of that inhuman treatment maybe the monkeys could be burned alive with gasoline as some other disciplines do. No, that's not suitable, a MSDS would be necessary for the gasoline. Can't slip anything by those regulatory agencies!

Good Luck, Old Salt

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#33
In reply to #29

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 8:06 PM

and inhuman treatment If some one has no food maybe he/she eats a burned meat of monkeys .

have a nice day.

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#39
In reply to #29

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 7:06 AM

If cyanide is not an option just use something that is offensive ,as far as taste, to the monkeys, like ground up lawyers?

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#41
In reply to #39

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 9:16 AM

Ground up lawyers? Are you trying to poison the monkeys, or worse, turn them litigious?

Ground up lawyers need to be sealed away with a less-toxic barrier between them and the rest of the world. You could make the containers out of nuclear waste, for example, then the lawyer remains could be sealed away under Yukka Mountain, at least until the nuclear waste deteriorated into mere lead.

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#32
In reply to #28

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 7:48 PM

You are not an Indian citizen. You are from Iraq.

What makes you think that you have the right to speak for Indian citizens?

Your response offends me!

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#34
In reply to #32

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 9:18 PM

Yes i am not an Indian citizen and i didn't mean to offend (or hurt felling) the Indians neither of the others i just shared the others the ideas of the things that are offence in India .i respect the Indian people too much and i appreciate what Indians had achieved in many fields like the space and the industry . i think there is a misunderstanding in my post

have a nice day Lyn

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#35
In reply to #34

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 12:37 AM

As I mentioned earlier India's democratic system is based on Unity in diversity. India has many religions, different cultures, hundreds of languages, etc. Social stratification exists in many parts of India . Eating habits varies from place to place. Government takes policy decision based on the elected representative's discussions in their respective state assembly. India has achieved remarkable progress during recent years in IT and space research. The posting here is related to how to protect the IT cables from animals. Specification of the installation of the cable needs attention rather than eating habit of people of India.

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#37
In reply to #28

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 1:35 AM

Classic, You are right about freedom of speech. Now India is Hindu majority country still we are calling India as Secular Republic where all religions can propogate their religion, there are Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, Parsies, Jews in India. In order to respect sentiments of Hindus some states have banned Cow slaughter. Will you allow anyone to eat pig in your country? no it is against your religion. Also you will eat 'Halal' meat only. Well these are eating habits of different religions and respected.

Iraq is our old friend so no ill feelings it is just discussion.

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#56
In reply to #37

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 4:01 PM

Are the momma monkeys allowed to slap the julab out of the delinquent teenage monkeys?

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#26

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/03/2015 3:48 PM

Had a similar experience with squirrels and the plastic covered gas hose to my grill. Here we call them "attack squirrels" since they will eat just about anything. They chew the plastic covering on the hose and then the hose leaks gas, not a good thing. To defeat them I patch each "intrusion" with good quality electricians tape, Scotch 33 or 88. Deters them in that spot so they chew in another spot. After several repairs I tape the whole thing up. Since they hate the tape, the problem is solved. I don't do the whole thing initially because the black tape makes it less pliable. At $35=50 for a new hose this type of repair works just fine.

See if monkeys hate black electrical tape. Squirrels climb, fly and become road kill just like monkeys so maybe it will work. Either that or coat the cables with rat poisoning or cyanide. Just think, the cable TV fails and you call them about the problem. They say that the cables failed because they needed to be recoated with cyanide! Don't plink (shoot) at them because without failure you will miss them and hit the cable. Maybe they have a hunting license available with a Monkey Stamp on it just like the Duck Stamps over here.

Good Luck, Old Salt

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#42
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 9:20 AM

"They chew the plastic covering on the hose and then the hose leaks gas, not a good thing. To defeat them I patch each "intrusion" with good quality electricians tape, Scotch 33 or 88. Deters them in that spot so they chew in another spot. After several repairs I tape the whole thing up."

Salt, I admire and respect you, but please understand that I will not be attending your backyard barbecues. I mean no offense, I just do not feel safe around your gas-powered bomb grill.

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#43
In reply to #42

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 2:30 PM

I'm sorry you won't be attending. I have just bought some 2" thick "T"-bone steaks in anticipation of your arrival. Oh well, I guess I will have to eat them myself. Medium-rare over a real hot grill just like in "Peter Lugers".

Checked the hoses with an LEL meter a couple of times and no obvious leaks throughout the length of the hose. Last time I got one, I taped it all up prior to using it and no chew marks yet. The OEM hoses are no longer made, very expensive (I would go the price if good ones were available) and still have the squirrel problem. A local hydraulic hose shop said he could make me up one that will last up to the squirrels but he want's around $200 for the custom job. That's almost as much as I paid for the grill about 13-15 years ago. Went the full cost for a good one and it has been worth the money, except for the squirrel problem.

Sorry about your change in plans.

Good Luck, Old Salt

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#50
In reply to #43

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 9:30 AM

Thank you for understanding, I'm glad we can stay friends.

Besides, REAL men grill over hardwood charcoal, not propane.

#BBQ-Wars

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#45

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/04/2015 3:26 PM

When I was building Los Angeles, we had problems with squirrels eating the insulation off of the main electrical wires on the poles. All well unless they crossed two with their bodies, which happened several times, and burnt out transformers, and weakened the lines still in place (Discovered during big storms.) Another phenomena was noticing the top Aluminum guy wires, on chain link fences , were deteriorated (gnawed on) for long lengths. You guessed it, squirrels again. Talking with a Biologist, he suggested that there may have been a dietary deficiency in their diet, and either aluminum or one of the alloys seemed to make up for it. There was tons of other food for them. Either that, or they used the wire to keep their teeth sharp. A 12volt current (electric fence) was proposed, but did not know how that turned out.

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#52

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 10:18 AM

Since the offending monkeys cannot be deterred using chemical repellants maybe it would be best to create a "Monkey Police Department" made up of only the highest IQ subjects?

These Police Monkeys would be much akin to "Trunk Monkeys" currently used to protect critical instrument and electrical controls.

All qualifying candidates could be educated and taught to patrol the wireway heavens punishing the offenders by utilizing only accepted monkey culture friendly methods normally used by monkeys in the wild.

Of course all of the police monkeys would have to undergo intense HR evaluation prior to becoming a field enforcer so that there would not be any "monkey business" going on.

The monkey police could be outfitted with bullhorns so that their voice commands would be much louder than all the other monkeys protesters gathered in the crowd.

This would ensure all offenders can clearly hear and understand all commands and warnings thereby attaining the highest level of compliance possible without punitive measures being taken against any individual offensive, noncompliant, antisocial monkey.

The police monkey would also be required to attend PI training so that they can identify each and every monkey personality trait to ensure that no monkey's feelings are hurt by any command or requests that infringe upon individual monkey entitlement.

And lastly all police monkeys must be outfitted with individual, personal cameras capable of video and audio recording with instant transmission to the appropriate monitoring agency.

Have I missed anything?

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#53
In reply to #52

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 10:46 AM

OMG!

Next thing, there will be classifications of these different monkeys -

Tree monkeys, sand monkeys, swamp monkeys, beach monkeys, stoned monkeys, monkeys with stones, monkey salad, tramp(oline) monkeys, monkey paw monkeys, organ-grinder monkeys, vine monkeys, street monkeys, ledge monkeys, ledger monkeys, rig monkeys, grease monkeys, monkey pavement, monkey butt monkeys, and on and on....monkey brains....police monkeys, fire monkeys, monkeys on fire, ambulance monkeys, monkeys in an ambulance...half-past a monkey's A**, a quarter to his B****, pot monkeys, monkeys on pot (already covered, see above), paper monkeys, department store monkeys, driving monkeys, driven monkeys, monkeys driven to ??, monkeys doing irreverent things with a football, sports monkeys, thinking monkeys, thought monkey police, PC monkeys, 1,000,000 monkeys with typewriters creating the Kama Sutra (or the Qur'an, or the Holy Bible, or the Torah, or the writings of Bhudda), or just one monkey with a single, zero opacity idea.

Just give the monkeys, their wine, and their pot, and don't worry, be happy.

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#54
In reply to #53

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 11:34 AM

We in the USA are in desperate need of a group of Congress Monkeys.

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#63
In reply to #54

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 9:19 AM

You mean to say that all of the baboons we currently have in congress do not measure up?

Oh well, I suppose I digress about our congress causing others too much stress.

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#62
In reply to #53

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 9:12 AM

YEP! And let us not forget all the "monkey shines" that according to some of my mentors occur every time a bunch of monkeys get together in a group.

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#64
In reply to #52

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 10:02 AM

Oh my, that post is sure to 'Shock the monkey(1),' you get a GA for that.

Notes:

  1. With apologies to Peter Gabriel and Shock himself for the title lift and bad pun, repectevely.
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#55

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 3:52 PM

You could install banisters for them to slide down and make monkeyshine.....

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#57

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/05/2015 5:48 PM

Never had to face this problem in my engineering career!

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#58

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 3:34 AM

Why are things holy...

I was travelling in a bus from Delhi to Jaipur and there were mosquitoes in the bus. One of the traveller, from Europe killed one and commented..."Are the mosquitoes holy like the cow"

Bus travel takes about 6 hours and over time, when we started talking, I asked him, Do you know why the cow is holy and has he been to the Indian state of Gujarat... No was his reply. So I told him...

The state of Gujarat is a barren land in most places and rain hardly falls there. The farmers plough their fields and wait for it to rain, sometimes 2 or 3 years. The land does not support vegetation and no trees around. Babbool and cactus are mainly found. People will keep cows and what does the cow do. It goes around the area, forages it's food and returns back in the evening, mostly a person will accompany with his water and lunch.

Now think which is better, kill and eat the cow or let it give you milk all throughout most of its life.

This is one reason the cow is holy. Once you say holy, any person believes and no need to convince. Being holy, it proliferates easily.

My fellow traveller, after I told him this, said that is quite logical and it makes sense.

Gajanan Phadte

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#59
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 6:40 AM

"The state of Gujarat is a barren land in most places and rain hardly falls there. The farmers plough their fields and wait for it to rain, sometimes 2 or 3 years. The land does not support vegetation and no trees around. Babbool and cactus are mainly found. People will keep cows and what does the cow do. It goes around the area, forages it's food and returns back in the evening, mostly a person will accompany with his water and lunch."

Gajanan, if Modi reads this he will be angry with you. Now Gujarat is not barren land. Because Narmada project supplies lot of water, there are many green fields.

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#61
In reply to #59

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 7:34 AM

You have to go to Kutch region.

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#77
In reply to #61

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 5:40 AM

kutch is naturally a swamp region.

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#60
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 7:27 AM

kill and eat the cow or let it give you milk all throughout most of its life.
Depends on how hungry you are at the moment.

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#65
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 10:12 AM

The lesson is on looking long-term verses short-term. You may remember one of these sayings:

"Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day, TEACH a man to fish, and he will eat for the rest of his life." (About the difference between offering a hand out or a leg up, also, since knowledge is a 'non-rival' resource, when you give a fish, you now have one fish less, but when you TEACH fishing, you have lost nothing for the others gain.)

"If you give a man an acorn, and he eats it, it will feed him for a day. But if he plants it, and nourishes it, it will grow into a mighty oak that will feed him and his children for generations." (About personal responsibility, and choosing to use what one has for the long-term, rather than use up the resources for a short-term gain.)

"If you give a man a match, he will be warm for a day. If you light a man on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life." (Sorry, my 'mad scientist' side snuck out for that one.)

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#68
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 2:45 PM

Seems you know something about playing with matches! Don't burn your britches, and put down that BB gun before you shoot your eye out!

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#69
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 3:08 PM

"Fra-GEE-lay? Must be Italian."

(To continue with a light joke.) ;)

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#70
In reply to #68

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 7:40 PM

How's Lake Allen Henry?

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#81
In reply to #60

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 9:37 AM

Depends on how hungry you are at the moment.... and on how many cows you have!

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#67
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/06/2015 12:55 PM

On the farm wherein I grew up, I had a holy steer - at least he was to me as little boy - I could and would lead him around by the horns from one yucca plant to the next, as he liked to munch on the flower pods. One time I watched him chase my dog (playfully) whilst the dog was chasing a jack rabbit (long eared one of the Western U.S.). That was a ridiculously funny sight to see, and was therefore holy to me. It was not so funny when my father took him off to be turned into steaks, but I did eat steak, and grew up strong and mostly healthy. It was holy if my mother cooked it. Our milk cows were definitely holy to my mother ( a staunch Chrisitin Baptist)....touch one of her cows with evil intent and she would let you know how holy that cow is. So you see, us Christians have our holy cows and eat them too. We even eat our Holy Book - by consuming the words off the pages as we read.

Define it, define holy. To me, holy water is water that serves its true purpose right now under heaven, but it can even be holy when it is stored for a later purpose.

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#71
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/07/2015 7:09 AM

One word - pure vegetarian...

You will be surprized to know what extent this goes. You cannot cook in the vessel in which you cooked or kept fish.

and don't tell me that milk is non veg, then the calf that drinks it's mother's(cow) milk is...

For info and no bragging please.

Gajanan Phadte

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#72
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/07/2015 11:22 AM

To the best of your knowledge, dear colleague, when in mankind's history did we start to domesticate the cow well enough to catch her and milk her, and start consuming dairy product?

I have read somewhere, that our hunter-gatherer bodies are not adapted to this diet, and this is a health issue (at least for some). I too have considered a total break with milk product, but I still like my butter on hot cereal, occasional Swiss cheese, so not completely. I am using almond milk on cereal many days, milk only when I run out of the other product (even coconut derived milk). The high rate of diabetes here in the West has something to do with the high salt, high sugar content, highly processed foods we consume. It is not healthy. Man does not live by bread alone.

Even when humans began to have milk, they did not have an over-abundance, I suspect, and so any deleterious health effects may have been diluted for a long time. Too much of a good thing, is not a good thing, especially when not shared.

I have my doubts that the human brain develops properly without some red meat in the diet. Scientific research has more or less proven this fact. If people wish to be Vegan, then that is their freedom to do so, however, with all blessings.

Live and let live....never waste. Thank your God when bounty is delivered to you from the good earth. This heart of gratitude will always gain more blessings than a heart of despair, selfishness, or envy. Just advice, not saying that my practice of this has been totally perfected. The thing is we are all here on this earth to learn all our lessons, then be gathered to our families.

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#75
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Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 4:34 AM

Dairy products as available in the supermarkets, packs and packs of it with different flavours and thin ladies on them...that is an overdose in any sense. Have you ever drank milk straight from the source, I doubt. Go hungry one day and then drink unprocessed natural milk. I don't advocate milk by that what I mean is go natural. Don't drink fruit juice instead take one fruit, wash it and eat without the use of any cutter. When you drink juice straight, one of the digestive process that happens in the mouth is bypassed. That is where the problem starts.

That poor guy with a family of half dozen mouths, small and big, in the village has a hut, one or two cows and a piece of land to survive. All ecofriendly as his hut is laiden with cowdung instead of the synthetic paint that is kiiling the earth.

If you were asked to catch, kill and eat, would you have killed everyday... not possible. That is what is plenty and it is by habit that you can digest meat as that is what you ate as a child.

As for diabetes, it is the result of tasty eating and sedentary lifestyle. Have you heard of a farmer, aged 93 that does it 3 times every night and is all healthy.

Vinegar is another problematic food product and the people who eat it regularly, have a poor digestive system.

But most what everyone eats is what is available easily and everybody is right.

One health tip...Do not drink beer or any other beverage/juice when you are thirsty, drink only water and when you are hungry eat some food to fill your stomach, but not FULL.

That is just some reality on this part of the globe.

Enjoy

Gajanan Phadte

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#82
In reply to #75

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 10:19 AM

I for one, am eternally grateful for the abundant supply of doctors that have come here to the U.S. from other lands to instruct us on the evils of over-consumption and debauchery. The weight I loose is gained by their wallets.

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#83
In reply to #75

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 10:23 AM

You might be surprised that I appreciate you for sharing your wisdom, and accept these tidbits of knowledge. I too was raised on a farm. My mother is the one who tended to all the milking. We had natural (un-pastuerized) milk, only that we allowed the cream to rise off it for butter making, and I have churned butter many times with a crank and paddle style butter churn. Buttermilk is also good for cooking biscuits, and as a cool beverage on warm evenings. My grandmother used to use dried "cow flops", but they called them "cow chips" as fuel for the wood burning kitchen stove, and so did my mother in the early days of my family (before I was born). They make a good clean fire, not smoky at all. Fortunately we didn't have to paint the walls with cow poop. We had beef cows raised from the milkers. One of our cows could produce enough milk for four calves (three extras from local dairy operations), and she would accept all four (with mother's encouragements), and still produce more than sufficient milk for a family of 8 (6 children, including me).

I seldom drink fruit juice, but do take whole fruit. I use a lot of berries in morning oatmeal, and I heartily recommend this to others. My oldest surviving sister is married to an older farmer (he is about 90-something), and he perambulates well enough, but I have not intruded into their bedroom habits. We westerners know something about digestive health - Germans especially figured out a long time ago that sauer kraut can be used as a digestive "reset button".

I think we have gotten lazy, and used to a diet rich in overprocessed grains, synthetic sugars as fructose, and other things which create havoc healthwise.

Alcohol intake I agree should be only taken with the highest moderation, as it states in the Holy Bible, "take a little wine for your stomach". Suggests that one of Paul's correspondents was having stomach problems, and wine was suggested as a "reset", but not to excess, and probably not as a daily thing. In that period of time, there was new wine, and old wine. I suspect the therapeudic wine was the new wine.

I think what made me diabetic was eating heavily late at night, drinking too much beer, scotch whiskey, and drinking beer or orange juice when I was thirsty from heavy work digging in my yard to improve the grass. Too much of a good thing is not a good thing.

Agricultural monoculture is helpful in providing food in quantity to the masses, but a more balanced approach would have many more grains in the production (quinoa, chia, barley, sorghum, wheat, oats, corn, rice, and others.) so that utilization of the food value would be better, and not so much on overdoing the caloric intake of over-processed grains in some breads.

Another problem is that cattle are less in numbers as range herds, and now are confined to feed yards. We now use all manner of anti-biotics, hormones, etc. to force the cattle to optimize their weight gain rate. Not good.

In the U.S. there are now many feral pigs (not native species, but ones that went into the wilds), and they destroy the habitats of other animals, and in some cases are a danger to people living in these areas. The hunt is open, but hunters are warned to never use the meat from these, as they are carrying trichinosis that is deadly to humans. The slightest cut while skinning of these animals, allows the pathogen to transfer, and it goes right to the brain, and results in death in not many weeks. All handling of these animals is to be done with double gloves including a final layer of Latex. Or just leave them where they lie. The meat is dangerous - many would not cook it properly to destroy the pathogen.

Wild pigs apparently do not carry this disease to the same extent nor as virulently when they do carry it.

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#84
In reply to #83

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 10:48 AM

Hello JS! I agree with most If not all) your thoughts, exept your comments about trichinosis, as the parasite has to be swallowed to get infective

Care must be taken when skinning animals with Carbuncle (Bacillus Anthraxis), which can transmit severe local diseases that may get lifetreatening if patient does not get an early tratment..

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#90
In reply to #84

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/11/2015 11:47 AM

I understand that to get the striated muscle cysts of trichinosis, one must ingest under-cooked meat from the infected host animal. However, the parks and wildlife officers in Texas are very emphatic about not using the carcasses of feral swine here, as the adult trichinosis worms and larvae are in the bowels and mucosa (as pointed out by the CDC diagram you posted), and any person with a laceration on the bare hands while skinning one of these infected animals could be subjected to a mucosal transfer.

I really was merely passing along information a friend shared with me and did not vet the information until now:

http://www.oie.int/doc/ged/d9167.pdf

The United States Department of Agriculture also distributes leaflets which describe the 'hidden dangers' of wild swine as a source of infection for humans and for domestic swine (11). The advice given in this leaflet to minimise the risk of hunters becoming infected with Brucella suis applies equally to the other infectious agents which may be present in the carcass, namely:

a)

Always wear disposable plastic or rubber gloves when

dressing and cleaning wild swine

b)

Avoid direct contact with blood and reproductive organs

c)

Wash hands with soap and hot water as soon as possible

after dressing wild swine

d)

Burn or bury gloves and remains from dressed wild swine

e) Cook meat from wild swine thoroughly.

Clearly, this advice applies equally to the person who receives

meat for preparation as human food and to the person

responsible for feeding the meat to other domesticated

animals (such as hunting dogs), if this is permitted.

https://tpwd.texas.gov/publications/pwdpubs/media/pwd_bk_w7000_0195.pdf

This has pretty much anything someone might want to know about harvesting feral hogs in Texa, and all are welcome to come get an out of state license to hunt here....you will still need a friend with land inhabited by feral hogs, or a game lease from the owners. In Texas, the wardens are definitely hunter friendly as long as all the rules are being followed. Saftey in cleaning the kill is also mentioned in this article. It seems that much of the concern is in regard to the several other diseases carried by the feral hogs, although trichinosis is mentioned, it is in the context of cold smoked meat (not fully cooked, or heated to a sufficient temperature to kill the cysts.

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#88
In reply to #83

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/11/2015 12:35 AM

Good to know your side. Internet is great otherwise how would we know the habits of the people on other side of the earth.

The most recommended diet for good health here is one that is difficult to digest, and it is sprouted beans like moong. I suppose what that helps is it develops a good digestive system, something like more difficulty making one, more tough. If it tastes too good, eat it very less. There is a local saying here...one that seats on a plate with onion pakodas and gets up without eating one, is healthy. The onion pakodas are very tempting and nobody can resist them.

We have become lazy, it is everybody's nature to enjoy easy life, but the evolution of our body is not as fast as the development.

Here it is said that all seasonal produces should be eaten when the nature grows them, and to be healthy, one should eat when only feeling hungry. May be, it means one should eat so much that the next time he wants to eat, he should be hungry.

For info and betterment of all...

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#79
In reply to #72

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 5:53 AM

Good thoughts. Hope accepted by many.

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#73

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/07/2015 3:05 PM

Hello, my name simian and I wish to complain of humans having cables that are not tasting good! Also some give dirty look to me.

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#74
In reply to #73

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/07/2015 6:40 PM

Monkey want a peanut?

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#76
In reply to #74

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 4:39 AM

That reminds me of the smart monkey in a zoo. It's a joke and makes me smile.

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#78
In reply to #76

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/08/2015 5:50 AM

Shall I give remark about that monkey?

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#89

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/11/2015 9:07 AM

sedentary lifestyle encourages (wrong word?) diseases that an active life discourages. im not expressing this well, but i hope yall understand what i mean. BTW, is it ok for Hindus to each dogs and cats?

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#91
In reply to #89

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/12/2015 12:03 AM

If you are going to die if you don't do it, it is allowed. For that matter, robbing little food for one's own consumption if it will save you and other dying members, is considered fine.

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#99
In reply to #89

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/13/2015 12:41 AM

What you eat...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yneyNx-SRzg

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#93

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/12/2015 1:17 AM

Here is an interesting vdo, forget the urine but he has some good points for health, just listen.

Cant paste the link, search 'gary ward urine therapy' on youtube.

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#94

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/12/2015 1:37 AM

<unsubscribe>

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#95
In reply to #94

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/12/2015 2:32 AM

As if anybody cares...

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#97
In reply to #95

Re: India Having IT Issues Due to Monkeys Eating Cables

05/13/2015 12:04 AM

2 OFF TOPIC votes, surprising only 2 pessimists...

Total pessimist attitude, grow up. Having knowledge is not all that is needed.

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