The incredible Backwards Walking Rocking Chair

No problem as long as you substitute a piece of cucumber for the borage leaf.

Salad is salad , and drink is drink ,and never the twain shall meet. Even God wouldn't want to make Pimms. Something nasty with Vodka is more my style (as a prelude to a kebab of course ).

Spice in the drink, not after it! Perhaps you'd prefer Pimms after all?

I shall experiment. Eric Adkins may be consulted before I attempt the Russian Hill though. I have (with my usual modesty ) a feeling that I'd be a natural. The spice must flow ...

He has decided to show off hiz opulence by a wearing cloths tailored from a many exotic fabrics!

Hey , the vermin bounces in again. A funny story is on it's way !Have you been salivating lately ? Just sort of wondering. Any strange sensations upon waking ?....he he.

Yes!!! "Oh f#*K! I have to go to work!"

How are you enjoying the mincing about?

I don't 'mince' , I strut ! And how the heck do you get about ? It looks like the only hope for you is a severe flushing , or has granma just let you escape from the knitting ?

Yes, you do strut, with a quite manly strut that can only be appreciated by other manly men!!! And together you converse about interior decorating and how each other's strutting is so manly!

I hop when I can, if space gets crumpet, I roll. It is the way of the vermin.

The way of the vermin ? pah !

You'll never be Bruce Lee. I , on the other hand , am well practiced in Bull-fighting. You littles ^*%*

I think you mean "Fighting Bull."

"No women in the ring!!!" And we men never leave the ring!!! Our nostrils full of the scent of bull droppings and testicle sweat! We find great companionship only with men that can appreciate the union between the true man and the bull!

And, yes, we comfort ourselves between death matches in the ring by sitting in our bunks and blowing each other Krissy. For we are men of the ring! Men among men! No place for women (pthuy!) here. It takes a manly man to know the needs of another manly man, and to appreciate the scent of his perspiration!!!

You ruin my subtle meanings and word play . Anyway , I thought you were a ...

Oh never mind

Or maybe its the seat that's missing (okay, try to figure this one out).

WalMart didn't bother to check the rocking chairs when they came in. And Cracker Barrel thought that's what a Cracker Barrel rocker was supposed to be like--so the barrel won't slide off the seat on the upbeat.

Anyway (what one particular Cracker Barrel customer didn't figure on), during the forward rock phase (Campbell's kids weren't instructed that this was a Cracker Barrel rocker), the seat lifts up following the momentum of its owner/occupant; but, on the back rock, the seat thrusts down and momentarily contacts the floor; and, in so doing, lifts the rocker runners off the floor ever so slightly. As the rocker runners lift, so does the chair; and the chair moves ever so slightly towards the rear--following the chair's and Campell's kid's momentum--until the rocker runners again contact the floor. Eventually, the chair and its occupant are noticed to have been butted all the way across the room.

UPDATE:

Yesterday I marked the floor with tape and straight line marked on it..

The wife was rocking the grandbaby, and not only did this chair go backwards, to the speed of approx 12 inchs in 15 minutes, it also turned about 20 degrees to the left..

go figure...

now we will have another 100 posts to figure this one out..

haha

So you're saying your only getting about 4 MPH out of that chair. Hell!!! Put some turbos on that thing! Change the cam timing! Go to a better exhaust system!!! This just ain't right!

4 fPH or 6.6 MPY showerly?

Which side was the baby , and what tune was the wife singing/humming . I'm guessing it was the right , and more lullaby than metalica. I've absolutely no idea what I would do with clarification , but this does keep up my post numbers.

'I've absolutely no idea'

So, you admit ignorance then? Return to zero! Do not pass go! Oh the shame......

How far up is Zero ? I strive to keep myself below it. It's a sort of inverted-snobbery thing applied to intelligence. If I keep really really stoopid , then each slip of sensible comment is regarded as a milestone that brings me admiring comment. Some work for years to get a Nobel prize and are quickly forgotten. I , on the other hand , will bask in eternal glory when I announce the ability to tie my shoe-laces.

I cite Parkinson's book as my logic : A new nuclear reactor will be dealt with by committee in minutes whereas the new coffee machine is discussed for hours - plenty of mileage in trumpeting the small success (and burying it's failure) , but damnation for the nuclear failure (and soon forgotten success).

Ive been tyeing my own laces lately, I've decided I need some exercise.

Hush puppies mate . Sandals work good for me , especially with recent weather .. No , the sun shines on the righteous ! That's a paradox .

I cite Parkinson's book as my logic : A new nuclear reactor will be dealt with by committee in minutes whereas the new coffee machine...

Hooray for James Parkinson (the guy who described the disease he called "Paralysys Agitans") it is amazing how far he has gone, considering he lived in the 18th century!!!!

I like the way you bought up James Parkinson. Quite a bloke , but his version of a 'day' is a little twisted ! I think my own Mr Parkinson was a more interesting person though. I can understand your preference for the medical one and he is certainly worthy of mention. I bet micro-surgery can suddenly appear as a real barrier ; fine-motor control that is only noticed (by it's absence) after years of training. Do med schools provide any testing ? Some trainees must have normally unseen tremor, that only shows up under a microscope type operation.

"Some trainees must have normally unseen tremor, that only shows up under a microscope type operation."

Hi Kris, a certain degree of tremor might be unavoidable, in partcular when magnified under a microscope. We usualy train joung colleagues in labs doing tings like suturing very thin silicone tubes together. If this doesn't work, we give them a pint of beer prior to surgery!

OMG I'm worried ! It just gets me as kind of strange . A person could go throgh years of intensive training , then one day - woosh. They get to apply all that hard earned skilll and find that they have 'hand -temor' . I don't mean in a jocular way. Most of us have shakey hands that are not evident in everyday life. Try to work under extreme magnification , and all of a sudden it's apparent. Is it not so that all people have varying degrees of fine motor control. One day , having invested your life in medicine , you find that this prevents performing skilled surgery ? I could be steady as a rock , but even under the best situation some unseeen but intrinsic shake would prevent me doing brain surgery. Can that ability be checked before all that training ?

Your scenario is indeed tragic, but many an armature has shaky hands. And to some extent (I think), some steadiness can be learned by becoming aware of certain muscles and learning how to relax them.

I have a doctor friend that loves to demonstrate the micro control of muscles that we are completely unaware of. He brings out a pendant on an 18" chain and a piece of cardboard on which two perpendicular lines are drawn. One line has "Yes" on both ends and the other has "No" on both ends. He hands the pendent to someone and asks them a question like have you killed anyone in the last hour. The pendent begins to swing in the "No" direction. This is a natural phenomenon, everybody has this... Heaven help us if it ever swings in the "Yes" direction!

"...loves to demonstrate the micro control of muscles that we are completely unaware of..."

And the good-old cup-on-a-map 'Ask The Dead' seance ritual?

Not worthy of a mention?

One day , having invested your life in medicine , you find that this prevents performing skilled surgery

People tend to overestimate the fine control a surgeon needs to have to perform a surgery succesfully!

We deal with tissues, and not with isolated cells!

Even the best surgeons make some OOOPS during surgeries...

..... tell me , tell me!!

Maybe it's just the media - I saw a TV drama where a surgeon is being trained in micro-surgery. He suddenly finds that he really struggles with fine motor control. Perhaps he was just hungover.

Another similar thing I saw was about piano playing. Some guy invented a simple contraption to measure wrist/finger flexibility. The idea was that some aspiring pianists are mechanically never going to be ultra good concert level players. I don't think the idea was to say 'you'll never be any good' , just to give people a more realistic idea of possible limitations they might reach. Not sure if that is good or bad. Being able to span an awesome range of keys is not the only measure of 'good'.

I have cancelled my planned vasectomy in Argentina. Insulting a football mob may get me a similar result for free.

He suddenly finds that he really struggles with fine motor control.

Soap Opera!

I have worked (or participated in surgeries) in countries like Germany, US and France... and some very renouned colleagues operated as if they had two left hands!!!

The idea was that some aspiring pianists are mechanically never going to..

HMMM, I believe it is just another stupid theory. To be good doing something does not correlate with the number of keys you can hit... it is a matter of how you do it!

There was a famous French guitar player called Django Reinhard (AKA the Gypsy). This guy had severe limitations in the movement of his right hand (it looked like a claw) because he got it severely burned being a child. Even with such severe limitations, he was (and probably will continue to be) one of the very best guitar players!

We are in agreement . (Except I'd go for Manitas de Plata since he's French and alive . I like to argue ! )

I'd go for Manitas de Plata since he's French and alive

Excuse my ignorance, but who the heck is "little silver hands"?

You can just listen if you can't read ! Maybe Feliciano ? Or crank it up ? I could play all night doing this . I think this thread is pretty much wrung-dry , so nobody can squeal off-topic too much.

UGH!

Your friend Manitas de Plata plays great... but I hate that kind of Spanish music!

I may be old fashioned, but prefer classical, jazz, big bands, bossa nova, tango....

Hey , I'm trying ! That link sounds a bit glitchy. So gimme some of your home grown stuff to check.

Just so everybody knows , I do not fancy r&ddoc ! I just like music.Anyway he's too far away for a deep and meaningful relationship.That's always my criteria for chatting to people. <LMAO>

YOU´VE GOT IT KRIS!

Stan Gets & Joao Gilberto are IT!

Want some local good stuff? Listen at Astor Piazzola. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTJQnCcFlvc&mode=related&search=

This guy (died in 1992) was an accordion player that revolutionized Tango that much, that he was treated as an heretic for having "distorted" the essence of this music.

He had a Quintett, and also played with great jazz artists like Gerry Mulligan or classical music performers like Jo Jo Ma.

After his death, Piazzola entered Tango´s hall of fame for having done what he did!

Glad you like , I'd been leading South-East of France gradually ! Over here it's Astrud who gets all the fame for that song.

Your link is cool . Very passionate music - it gets into you as if you've heard it before. Obviously taps straight into the emotions and all that , which is a measure of good music.

If I didn't have 2 left feet I'd learn how to Tango etc , since the ladies all seem to love that ! So much cooler than all that night-club 'shag-me-now' dancing. A tango is a bit more like 'I'm already making love with you' done with style and class. Oh gawd , I just figured why I can't tango !

Hey , I'm trying !

This version of Desafinando (being out of tune) by Stan Getz is actually a Bossa Nova Medley, as it ends wit The Girl from Ipanema... also great!!!!

By the way I am the cousin of this lady: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jUG9ERn2So unfortunately I haven't got a bit of her talent!

And what's wrong with Andrés Segovia?

Other than that he's dead, I can think of very little.

Fyz

So's Hendrix... What's your point?

Harvey Mandel perhaps?

Maybe Jeff Beck or Al DiMeola?

I personally like Fred Frith.

- Crumbs anyone?

The wording of your question is all - I can't immediately recollect a post asking "what was wrong with" Hendrix (in any event, there was plenty - that was part of what made him great)

Yes! So now say 'sorry' vermin for loosing off with your touchy keyboard. The Brits have been saying sorry* for years and now it's your turn. Ha.

Fyz got you square between the eyes, and gave a cool description of Hendrix.

* OK , it doesn't usually mean 'sorry' but that's not the point.

You've lost me completely, big guy.

My 199 explains 192 ?

See , your posting to fast (again) for me to catch up. I would kind of like to see you and Fyz bash each other about - but only if I plan it. People doing it by mistake is simply not good enough.Now I must go caress my megalomania......<insert appropriate insults>

Ya know, one of these days we'll figure out where Etherville is. You'll look out your window and see the weirdest bunch of characters heading for your digs with torches and pitch forks.

I'm real easy to find. Enough trail for a coke toting badger. Is them torches the same as when people wave lighters ? Tell 'em to put the pitch in buckets else it'll slop all over the place and mess up my garden.

You need to dig real deep to get to Etherville. And I think you'll find that your torches have been overcome and your pitchforks melted well before you arrive.

Fyz

This Etherville?

Much hotter, I think

Do you mean Estherville? Naaaah....

No, very much hotter, and UK based - and part of our straight-underground scene

Fyz

Give's a link for C-Sake! Are we Goats?

First sentence miles off. Second sentence getting closer. Last time I investigated, no links were available for that site. Perhaps Kris knows different, however.

Surprisingly, so did the Paratroopers, James Brown, and paying his dues. The messed up stuff didn't come until later.

Here is a krisinterpretation ,

Other than that he's dead, I can think of very little.

<translates roughly to>

The bloke was chuffing brilliant . Apart from having passed away he was a faultless and brilliant musician. His mastery of his art was so good that not a single thing wrong could be said of his talent.

<That's my take on it. Chucked in cos I wouldn't like to see you stewing all night until Fyz can clarify in several hours>

Anyhow , was Segovia a paratrooper ?

At his age probably more like a Musketeer.

I wasn't pissed, I was just replying. And Jimi (Who talks to me frequently) said "This'll shut the sucker up." I just type the reply - Jimi didn't want to join CR 4 or log in as Guest.

What can ya do with these artistic types!

Yeah , artistic types are all tempermental !

Elvis told me that. He's in hiding cos the U-bend got all blocked up. No problem though,I'll just use the cat tray. It really freaks the maid out. Next time I'm gonna use the bird table and see if she believes that too.I'm just going to keep her in the dark as payback for slamming the freekin door. Ha

Ok, there just has to be an Elvis outfit (including wig and glasses) hanging in your closet - á la Norman Bates.

Everyone knows (except you, apparently) that Elvis just returned to his home planet.

And the maid is pissed, because she found you going dookie in the cat's box.

see-saw see-saw see-saw..

Elvis in your neck of the woods, I can't believe it - that Heavenly voice...

Jimi was not only a great musician spreading immense influence for tens of years ahead, he was also a great soul, with friends praising him to this day.

And what's wrong with Andrés Segovia?

Nothing at all. I like his music, as it has a more elaborate background than Flamenco.

Anyhow it is just a matter of taste: I don't... but man other do.. just like that!

And for whoever said Wal Mart, it is an "Original" Cracker Barrel Rocking Chair:

Just so all you "Chatty Cathys", won't forget the ORIGINAL POST...Here is the Rocking Chair:

Also, here is the Original Backward Walking Rocking Chair Grandma..

http://campbelllighting.electrical-contractor.net/

Now, let's see if we can have ANOTHER 200 posts about this... haha

Grandpa...

Isn't the figure in the logo St. Malcohlmfort, who walked backwards all the way to the Crusades? Or was it the other way around?

It's interesting that Bach wrote for guitar. I've played a Segovia CD for several guitar playing friends. They listen very intently, then usually make a remark like, "How is he doing that?!" or "I didn't know a guitar could do that!!!"

Segovia brought me back to liking the sound of guitars, after it was beaten out of me by my brother's attempt to play electric - always at 10!

The funny thing I've heard about Flamenco is that while the singers seem to pour their heart and soul in the words, they usually consist of something like "My mother sent me to the fish store to by a fish..."

You really crack me up, Bach writing for guitar. Ever heard of transcription?

Yes, I know, but he really did write pieces for the guitar specifically.

Please forgive my arrogant ignorance. I was not aware of that. Would you give BWV numbers (or other easy reference)?

Thanks and regards

Fyz

P.S. Or did you perhaps mean Lute?

The funny thing I've heard about Flamenco is that while the singers seem to pour their heart and soul in the words, they usually consist of something like "My mother sent me to the fish store to by a fish..."

I do not like Flamenco (at all)... but it is a very complex form of art, because it combines a certain way of singing, playing "castañuelas" and guitars, and dancing.

Lyrics are somehow more poetic than "buying fish" many are very naive like: I would like you to be translucent as air, for nobody being aware you are that close to me"

Renowned Spanish poets have written Flamenco as well. One is Antonio Machado.

Interesting! Do you know of the Gypsy contribution to Flamenco? Roma would be the correct name - and their lineage all the way back to Northern India?

Do you know of the Gypsy contribution to Flamenco?

Yes I do: despite I´m an Argie, our motherland is Spain!

Flamenco plays a very importan rol in the Spanish folk music, being mainly played in Andalucía, where (probably) the largest amount of descendants from Gypsys live.

I knew the came from Central / Eastern Europe... but did´nt know you can track their lineage back to India!

did this work?

OK, so you can add text to the threads tag line! Interesting.

Here's another test.

OK, so now we know, the tag line can be edited to say anything you want, but your comment will still be posted to the correct place!!!

"...but this does keep up my post numbers"

Hi Kris,

sorry to say so, but I have the feeling that replies to replies do not keep up the count!

Do you seriously think I would initiate this kind of cr....

There's just no telling where a thread will end up. Serious threads go nuts and nutty threads go serious. I do my best to confuse this process , and CR4 reward me with a nice sounding title. It would be kind of fun if tactics were changed next time. We could all post 'so who the crap cares' /'the answer is' , with later posters trying to find new phrases for this. The process is continually happening with Challenge Questions. I should know , because I've turned such chaos into an art form.

My crap-o-radar has to go visit an aspiring thread. For a strange reason intelligent discourse emerged.

Do you seriously think I would ...

!

You carry the badge , and believe me , I want to know if you can dissect my brain. ! Behave !!

I want to know if you can dissect my brain

Living brains are really beautiful! Once you open the Dura-Mater (protective "skin") which is opalescent, you have the most incredible image of what 3D is: the brain is in the background, and little vessels are floating within the spinal fluid. Once you open the Arachnoid membrane spinal fluid gets lost, and magic is over!

In regard to your question: NO WAY! I have the feeling your brain is a sort of Pandora's Box!

I have the feeling your brain is a sort of Pandora's Box

....nah , The box had some hope !

I have a personal gripe with the First Aid community. A cut from an axe or knife can often sever a vein or artery. And if this happens to someone far off the beaten path it might be days before they can reach proper medical care. Sure, they train you how to take care of broken bones and the stuff is right in the First Aid kit, but what about the severed artery?! In days you could bleed to death or at least eventually lose an appendage because of lack of blood flow.

I for one seriously believe that First Aid training should cover how to suture together an artery or vein in an emergency situation, and have the equipment in the kit for doing so.

A tourniquet should never be applied to the neck. It stops the patient from describing symptoms adequately. I always carry a rust knife and Biro in the hope that I get to practice a tracheotomy.

Well said!

My Swiss Champ pocket knife helped me a lot as well

I for one seriously believe that First Aid training should cover how to suture together an artery or vein in an emergency situation, and have the equipment in the kit for doing so

I fully agree with you!

...this kit should not only include the equipment for suturing arteries, but also some other stuff like a laparoscope, which can be used for a emergency kidney stone surgery, as well as in a "in Vitro" fertilization, should you have missed the target while making love to your wife!

When (much) younger I used to put all kind of stuff inside a First Aid box I took along every time we made out-door life. It was a pain in the $#@ to carry this around as it was hevier than a 40Ft. container! Trooth is I never used it.

I've heard of reconnecting a severed artery with a piece a drinking straw, but that in itself can cause complications.

Come on!!! Why won't you let me sew it up?! Or is it good to let it bleed, because it balances the bodily humors.

According to your account, it seems like it's so deformed by now, that it's probably in the advanced process of going apart

Slightly asymmetric loading, ditto rockers, or women drivers. Take your pick, but don't tell my wife.

Fyz

Whose wife? And on what side was she holding the baby? Maybe tell that wife to move baby to the other side and measure the side slip again to see what changes? Also, did you hear any lullaby...indicating baby was being rocked? That could account for the sideslip as well.

Awaiting your report back...

Something's off center. Your wife isn't sitting in the middle, the baby's on the other side. Solution would be for them to change places every 15 minutes or so to make sure they stay on course.

To go faster, the baby should increase engine power by crying a little louder. This will cause grandmom (the engine) to increase impulse power making the ship go faster. Of course, to stay on course, they will have to change places more often.

If they start to hear creaking noises, tell them to come to a full stop and call Scotty to repair the thing while grandmom dissolves di-lithium crystals for the baby's stomach.

Then you send them a subspace message to stay within Federation territory. If they cross the Neutral Zone, they may risk damage from falling off the porch.

It is a simple matter. The chair moves because he's not used enough nails to hold it to the floor.

"...Break the speed of light and you'll have to buy it..."

I'm still laughing my ass off...

It is a simple matter. The chair moves because he's not used enough nails to hold it to the floor.

You'ld do that to a baby ? The woman possibly , but a poor sweet baby ?

ROFLMAO

Not strange at all; nor devious--at least not by guest responder. The IP specifically requested a logistician's viewpoint on the matter. Such had not been plainly evident prior to the "strange" post.

Here would be an interesting experiment to try... Take the chair to the garage/shop and hang it from three different points to find the exact (or best approximation) of the chair's center of gravity. Make some kind of mark at the center of gravity that is either removable or where no one will see it.

Put someone in the chair, and see whether when rocking they pass over the center of gravity. My first guess is that anyone sitting in the chair never passes over the center of gravity in the forward direction, and the occupant stays to the back of the center of gravity.

hang it from three different points to find the exact (or best approximation) of the chair's center of gravity

The chair is symmetrical . Last time I checked a plane and a line intercept at a point. Can we have just one hanging vermin ? I agree that more than one is fun , but it might take a while depending on accuracy. Would we get mini pyramids or mini-chairs to define the c.o.g. ?

No. On anything other than the most rudimentary shapes, you have to hang the object from three different axes to find the center of gravity. Also, just consider that we're talking wood here, not PVC. So, there may be significant differences in the density (and therefore, weight) of the chair's components.

On the other hand if we had a squirrel here, we could hang that instead in sacrifice to the demon of geometry.

You mischievous and misleading bundle of detritus**! Unless you live in a world that has four or more spatial dimensions, or the gravitational field is significantly non-uniform, one hanging from a single point plus one hanging from a pair of points (or a single point, of course) is enough* to establish the centre of gravity. And, of course, you only need one suitably chosen hanging to establish that the CofG coincides with the plane of geometric symmetry.

Fyz

*Provided you ensure that the single point does not lie in the plane of the pair, of course.
**Given your identity, I trust you will take that as a glowing compliment.

P.S. In bygone days, the British government used to confirm the symmetry check worked on a regular basis using people found guilty of quite minor misdemeanours. I understand that miscreants were generally found to be asymmetrical.

Fyz ! You care for the poor squirrel ! Being unkind , I was going to suggest that vermin was too shallow to see beyond 2-D. I wouldn't do so really. Meaningless would be nearer to 0-D. Only joking vermin. I still want to know the limiting case Fyz - would 3 hanging just approach an infinitesimal 3-D locus for c.o.g. ? My School teacher said 'yes' , but I say 'no' . I am also still seeking an answer to the axle position for my planned 'multi-cycloid-rim bicycle' wheel (a sort of 50 penny-farthing type thing). Perhaps vermin could build me one , with one set of cycloids inside another insides anot......( I could take somebody for a ride on it maybe)