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Last post, we talked about the series of events that lead up to two people talking and eventually becoming intimate. I also mentioned that although it appears that men make all the moves, it's actually women who initiate up to 90% of these interactions because they are sending physiological signals. Men may or may not consciously notice the movements, but their subconscious does and that's when they make their move. So…I'm presenting you with top secret information on reading the body language of a woman. Use it wisely.
The Signs
Although the sequence of events discussed in the last post may seem minor or even common sense, they are critical to the start of a new courtship and are often the most challenging part because it can be hard to read the signals. Here is an abridged list of courtship gestures and signals.
This video is a clip from a documentary about Indicators of interest (IOI'). To learn the signals skip to about 3:20 in the video.
- Playing with her hair- A body language movement for women only, but the twisting or flicking of hair is a sign of interest or attraction. It shows that the women cares about how she looks and also subtly releases pheromones from the armpit (I know it's not pretty, but it's biology).
- Wet lips with mouth slightly open- When a woman becomes sexually aroused, her lips, breasts, and genitals become larger and redder as they fill with blood. A woman will put on red lipstick to mimic this reaction and wet her lips as a sexual invitation.
- Limp wrist- This is a submissive signal used exclusively by women and gay men because it's a great attention getter. It can be related to a bird pretending to have a damaged wing to distract pray from its nest. Women should be careful with this signal though; in business it can ruin your creditability because the man will believe he can dominate. Along with the wrist gestures, exposing the wrist also has a similar effect since the underside is a very sensitive part of the body. It's uncertain whether this is a learned behavior or is innate, but it certainly operates on an unconscious level.
- Pelvic tilt and hip roll- Women are known for this hourglass figure. The figure is formed because of the women's hip-to-waist ratio. A normal hip-to-waist ratio is 70 percent, which according to medical evidence, shows that a woman is in excellent health and is capable of successfully bearing children. According to a study done at the University of Texas, the hips-to-waist ratio that holds the greatest appeal is between 67 and 80 percent. The way a woman highlights this ratio is to stand with her pelvis tilted.
- Lower limbs- There are quite a few signals that a woman can give with her lower body. Pointing her knee towards you during conversation not only makes the situation more relaxed; it also shows that she's interested in what you have to say. Crossing her legs while sitting draws attention to the muscle tone and dangling the shoe on the end of her foot also indicates a relaxed and comfortable attitude.
- Seeing their teeth through the smile- A real smile will show as least one row of front teeth and cause wrinkles to form in the corners of the eyes.
So the next time you're at a party or event, watch the individuals around you. Does the guy stand a chance with the girl he's talking to, or is she pointing her knee at someone else. You perhaps?
Resources
Body Language: In state of flirting
Reading Body Language
Pease, Allan, and Barbara Pease. The Definitive Book of Body Language. New York: Bantam, 2006. Print.
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Re: Learning the Body Language of Attraction-Part 2
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