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Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 10:51 AM

During a smoke break some co-workers and I began talking about ciggarettes. We discussed the number of stripes on a Camel Light. Then the toxicity of nicotine (it is more toxic than stricnine or arsenic I've been told). Then it was stated that the ocean liner Queen [sic] burns 1 gallon of deisel for every 6 inches it travels. Next were the crickets. Someone suggested that if you counted the number of chirps over 15 seconds and added the number 40 the result is the current air temperature (I don't know if that is F or C).

So. What is the most useless piece of knowledge that YOU possess?

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#1

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 12:29 PM

With your back to the wind in the Norther Hemisphere... low pressure is on your left.

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#2

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 12:30 PM

Handy for me but useless for anyone else...

My span is 10" ... two more inches and my hand would be a foot!

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#48
In reply to #2

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 9:22 PM

Is this knowledge useless enough:

Leonardo [da Vinci] was the love child of Caterina, a peasant, and Ser Piero, a lawyer and landlord. He was homeschooled and lacked a formal education in Greek and Latin.

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#3

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 1:45 PM

The problem with memory, there is so much of it. What piece are you talking about, I have tonns of the stuff.

Like "Draw knives were use to make broom handles during the 1920's

Got more of that.

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#4

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 2:07 PM

About smoking I don't know, but I know of a man that went into a 6 months coma when he gave up smoking.

About the ocean liner, quite possible, A coal powerplant consumes about 1 ton every 12 min. On one of the bigger plants the contents of one of these big trucks is consumed in 34 seconds.

About the chirping crickets - Our beetles in SA are calibrated in Celsius. But they can only do it if they watch the weather forecast on TV.

We actually counted the chirps one night only to find out that the place should be on fire. Later on a second beetle joined the frequency was different. (must have been a cool cat).

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#5

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 2:38 PM

When fletching an arrow you have to use feathers from the same side wing. If you put left wing feathers with right wing feathers it won't spin , it'll wobble and won't fly straight... !

How useful is that?

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#6
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 2:48 PM

I was thinking more along the lines of "there are 118 ridges around a dime (U.S. ten cent coin)."

But yours is pretty useless; as I have not been involved in any archery for some time now.

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#7
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 2:55 PM

There were 12 flats around an old thruppenny bit!

It's a great thread when someone saying your post is useless is a compliment!

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#8

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 2:56 PM

The closer you get in proximity of a mountain, the more you are pulled towards it. People around mountains are really leaning, they just don't notice it.

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#61
In reply to #8

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 7:13 AM

Yes!

Though note they are leaning away from it.

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#9

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 3:14 PM

Just before the rain starts, "Maple trees will turn their leaves upside down, and, cows will lay down."

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#10

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 4:45 PM

Dairy cows spend 8 hours a day chewing their cud.

How's that for obscure worthless information. I got that one from my father-in-law who used to drive a milk tanker.

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#58
In reply to #10

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 5:36 AM

Unionised then, or just making their point!

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#11

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 4:56 PM


The term "Clockwise" spins in its set direction because it was created in Te northern hemisphere.

(I hope this doesn't upset anyone) The term "Limy" originated from the English Navy. The would stay at sea for vast lengths of time. Many sailors died from Scurvy,(a vitamin C deficiency.) Limes where added to their diet to prevent this.

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#12

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/21/2007 5:37 PM

My wife could help with this...........It's the whole genre of how the position of the moon and stars effects things like planting crops, setting posts killing weeds ad nauseum.

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#13

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 4:21 AM

We're all gonna die!

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#14

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 4:22 AM

If I could fold a piece of paper in half 44 times it would reach from here to the moon (250,000 miles +/- a few miles). I'm assuming a 0.002" thick paper to start with. 9 folds takes me to 1.024", drop the odd bit after the decimal point and round down to 1.000", then, remembering that 63,360" = 1.0 mile, so to get there, another 10 folds takes me to 1000.0", again rounding down to the whole number and after that another 6 folds takes me to 1 mile, from there it's just a few wrench twirls and I'm there, 10 more folds takes me to 1000 miles, then the last 8 folds get me there with one fold to spare (so I could have started with 0.001" paper, using that one extra fold). A note to NASA - you have my full permission to use this if you want.

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#15
In reply to #14

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 4:32 AM

Good one... completely useless!

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#26
In reply to #14

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 3:15 PM

Unfortunately, you can only fold a piece of paper in half 7 times.

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#27
In reply to #26

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 4:21 PM

Actually Myth Busters got to 11. But they had to use a fork lift on the last couple and they started with a very large thin piece of paper.

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#28
In reply to #27

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 4:24 PM

Ah..I didn't know that..it's quite usefull.....D'oh

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#29
In reply to #28

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 4:38 PM

Oh darn I forgot to be useless! That means it's off topic!

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#38
In reply to #26

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 10:07 PM

Nope. I got 9 folds.

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#37
In reply to #14

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 10:06 PM

However, you cannot fold a piece of paper in half 12 times (normal everyday paper).

Try it.

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#16

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 6:34 AM

A rolly-polly has 11 segments to its shell.

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#17
In reply to #16

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 7:19 AM

So vermin, did you actually count them?

If so, I would have to ask if perhaps you need a hobby!

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#18
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 7:27 AM

For invoking the disdain of fellow posters, that means I win!!!

Nope, I read it on Wikipedia... How's that for sad!!!

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#19

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 8:27 AM

Did you know,

It was necessary to keep a good supply of cannon balls near the cannon on war ships! The problem was to stop them rolling about! The best storage method was to stack them in a square based pyramid, with one ball on top, resting on four, resting on nine, resting on sixteen, thus thirty cannon balls could be stored close to the cannon using a relatively small space. There was only one problem! how to stop the bottom layer slipping from under the next layer. The solution was a metal plate with sixteen indentations called a monkey. But if this plate was made of iron, the balls would soon rust to it, the solution was to make brass monkeys. Now as you know, brass contracts much faster than iron, consequently, if it was too cold, the balls would fall of the monkey, hence 'freeze the balls off a brass monkey'!

I thank you.

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#20
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 8:41 AM

Did you know that wooden ships got so large and deployed so many cannons on each side that if all the cannons were fired at the same time it would break the keel of the ship. Thus, the invention of the "rolling broadside," which allowed all cannons on that side of the ship to be fired without sinking itself.

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#22
In reply to #19

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 8:49 AM

Sorry Truman But you lose.

I actually found your post interesting and possibly useful for betting on a round of drinks at the watering hole.

That makes your post "possibly" useful.

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#41
In reply to #22

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 7:14 AM

Bugger! I promise to try harder in the future and post some useless stuff aswell!

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#21

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 8:44 AM

For God sakes, Rummel! Where the hell did you get a picture of my ex-father-in-law!

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#23

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 8:59 AM

OK. Here comes another maritime useless fact... The reason why so many seaman (No jokes!) wound up with an eye patch is because using a sextant to sight the Sun would blind their good eye!

That was before the time that their mothers told them "If you keep doing that you'll go blind!"

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#32
In reply to #23

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 6:29 PM

If you can read this then what you did did not make you go blind.

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#40
In reply to #32

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 1:34 AM

Could you write that over again? Perhaps using a larger font... I can't quite make it out.

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#51
In reply to #32

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 10:03 PM

I actually heard it different. The pirate would 'patch' one eye during the day so that at night he was equipped with a more sensitive organ (no jokes) for viewing the horizon in pitch dark.

cr3

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#53
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 10:16 PM

Yes, I saw that episode of Mythbusters, as well. But it's not really true. The last thing you want to lose on a functioning ship is your depth perception.

If you were going to navigate anywhere in the open seas, you had to use the sextant to "shoot the sun." Also, eye patches are not limited to pirates. They were ubiquitous among the total seagoing population.

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#54
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 10:20 PM

Is that where I heard that? Hmmm. It sure sounded good to me. And after having to spend three weeks with a patch on my eye in my early teens I know that the night vision concept seemed probable.


cr3

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#55
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 10:32 PM

So what would be the advantage to wearing them while ashore?

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#56
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 2:38 AM

Professionalism.

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#65
In reply to #56

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 9:37 AM

What's all this about Sextants? If you look at the sun with that or anything else you'll blind yourself faster than the other way. Use it strictly for looking at the stars. What if you need to know where you are during the day? Wait for GPS.

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#67
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 12:51 PM

This reminds me, 'The left hand doesn't know what the right is doing' is a questionable statement. Viking 'Sunstone' may aid navigation on a cloudy day.

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#24

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 10:35 AM

Did you know that if you layed all the world's politicians end to end they would reach across the atlantic (UK to USA)

But more importantly they would drown.

John.

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#25
In reply to #24

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 1:34 PM

Nice thought but sorry E'man. Hot air rises. They would all float about causing global...............something.

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#66
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 9:47 AM

STINKING !!

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#39
In reply to #24

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 1:29 AM

If you laid all the economists end to end they would all point in different directions.

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#47
In reply to #39

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 6:36 PM

If you laid all the economists end to end they would all point in different directions

The way I heard it was that could you lay all the economists in the world end to end and never reach a conclusion!

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#50
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 9:24 PM

That works, too!

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#62
In reply to #24

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 7:17 AM

Who was it who said, "If you laid all the girls in Southampton University end to end, no one would be surprised"? That's a pretty useless fact.

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#30

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 5:47 PM

The 'boy' who is a central character to the film The Golden Child, is in fact a girl. A 'friend' informed me of this gem, after the film was over and I could no longer scrutinize the face.

99% of banknotes circulating in London have drug residue on them. This is useless because buying them for the drugs makes no economic sense.

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#31

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 6:25 PM

Three actors from the original Star Trek TV series appeared in episodes of Perry Mason. They are Leonard Nimoy (Spock), DeForrest Kelly (Dr. Leonard "Bones" McCoy), and George Takei (Sulu). Kelly and Takei played chareacters that were close to Mason's client and were potential suspects. Nimoy played the victim's husband, and he was the killer. Nimoy's character was one of the few murderers exposed outside the courtroom.

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#34
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 8:50 PM

William Shatner, James T. Kirk in the original Star Trek played a passenger on an jet flight in a Twilight Zone episode. He was the main character and the only one who saw the hairy ape man that was riding on the wing trying to destroy the engine.

It was one of my favorite episodes along with the one with the slot machine.

There you have two pieces of useless information.

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#36
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 9:51 PM

That hairy ape man was a 'Gremlin'

I'd tell you about the origin .... but no, you may be interested.

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#52
In reply to #31

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 10:05 PM

Now you've spoiled the ending.

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#33

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 7:54 PM

If you find yourself stranded in the Arctic* and encounter a Polar Bear, NEVER consume all of it's liver. The vitamin A would kill you.

* This applies in a zoo as well.

Sorry, that was almost interesting.

There are 31 people on CR4 at present, this is a considerable way short of the record.

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#68
In reply to #33

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 9:44 AM

<There are 31 people on CR4 at present, this is a considerable way short of the record.>

Who's Online (244 right now)

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#69
In reply to #68

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 12:24 PM

My record observation was 2 I think. Whole damn show collapsed for a while wiv a DOS attack. When I got back in, some other buggers were there first. I don't know if that would have made me 'first last' or 'last first'. Maybe just sad at that time of night !

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#70
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 3:53 PM

"While Eeyore frets ... ... and Piglet hesitates ... and Rabbit calculates ... and Owl pontificates ...Pooh just is."

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#83
In reply to #70

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 1:03 AM

Like Tigger, I just keep coming back for more !

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#85
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 1:15 AM

From the Tao of Pooh?

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#90
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 9:55 AM

Yes oh most wise one. Shall we try the Cottleston pie?

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#35

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/22/2007 9:22 PM

Energy in >= energy out! - Useless for PM fanatics.

If you make the back wheels of a car bigger than the front wheels it will always run downhill and run by itself. Absurdly useless.

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#42

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 7:19 AM

In a survival situation, you can't survive on rabbit alone! The body uses more energy to digest it than the rabbit provides! How's that for a gem of useless info?

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#49
In reply to #42

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 9:22 PM

It's not quite correct. Most jack rabbit meat is so dry, eating it will dehydrate you from diarrhea.

Trout, on the other hand do not have enough calories to keep you alive.

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#57
In reply to #42

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 2:53 AM

In UK English, 'rabbit' is often taken to mean excessive talk (usually of a trivial nature). I therefor agree with you Mr Truman Brain. vermin's mention of trout can be proven in similar fashion.

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#43

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 9:11 AM

If you interlock your fingers with your thumbs facing each other, you can't fluidly move your thumbs in opposite circular rotations.

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#44
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 9:19 AM

I can, quite well actually. Although I do notice that it is a little easier in one direction.

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#45
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 9:33 AM

Damn you! Don't you see what you've gone and done now???

You've rendered his 'fact' useless which in terms of this thread means it's... really good !

Oh no I've confused myself now !

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#46
In reply to #45

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/23/2007 4:16 PM

Yeah those multiple negatives can be that way. Was it odd in number or even...

And if a post is off topic in an absolutely useless thread is it really then on topic??

Some things are hard to know.

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#59

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 5:57 AM

Number 52 is puzzling me. Where is Del when you need him !

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#74
In reply to #59

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 5:57 PM

Puzzling, but true! I use a rug cleaner that is specifically targeted at pet stains. If there is a lingering ...er... "aroma" after cleaning, they'll rent you a "black-light" so you can find the spots you missed. So I guess it isn't a useless fact at all. Sorry!

Wait - WAIT! I can salvage this bit with a related but truly useless fact:
Spider blood also glows under UV light. How useless is THAT??

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#84
In reply to #74

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 1:09 AM

Nice try, but I'm thinking about if it's true. You therefor divert me from posting more than my usual number of annoying posts which is probably useful !

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#91
In reply to #84

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 10:23 AM

Well, I do try to be as diverting as possible.

BTW, the source for the spider blood thing was a Science News article (back in May?).

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#92
In reply to #74

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 12:27 PM

I've been investigating a recent spider death. That is not useless at all!

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#60

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 7:10 AM

It takes a man in a grey tweed suit 41/2 seconds to fall from the top of Big Ben to the ground. Michael Caine said so.

And there's not many people know that.

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#63

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 8:29 AM

The word envelope comes from France.

Pretty much makes it useless just from origins.

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#64
In reply to #63

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/24/2007 8:47 AM

A bar beer towel makes an excellent mouse mat!!!!

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#71

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 4:46 PM

Ok one more.

In the Wizard of Oz original movie Bernie Epson was originally cast as the Tin Woodsman but was unable to play the part because he was alergic to the make-up used at that time.

Whats more is that even though he is not credited for his performance in the movie as his face is not shown at any time, there are distant shots in the movie that are of him.

This was so they would not have to reset the props and backgrounds for these scenes.

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#72
In reply to #71

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 5:14 PM

Ok, how bout this one.

The book, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, was written by Charles Dodgson under the pen name Lewis Carroll.

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#75
In reply to #72

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 6:00 PM

Sorry, not useless - you might actually need that one for an exam in Kid Lit class.

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#77
In reply to #75

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 7:45 PM

Guess you're right. My kids are grown so I had forgotten about such things.

How bout this one:

One sign of rain that farmers once searched for was for their pigs to pick up sticks and walk around with them in their mouths.

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#88
In reply to #72

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 8:37 AM

That's a good one for pub quiz nights, so sorrry, it's not useless.

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#115
In reply to #71

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/28/2007 4:15 PM

Actually it's Buddy Ebsen, not Bernie Epson.

I apologize for any usefulness you may glean from that fact

But perhaps more useless is the fact that Donna Douglas (Ellie May Clampett) was in the Twilight Zone episode Eye of the Beholder. She was the "deformed" beauty that was so depressed because no amount of plastic surgery could make her fit in with the monster faced humans that populated Earth.

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#116
In reply to #115

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/28/2007 4:31 PM

OOPS. I guess I was pretty tired that day. Cause I really did know that LOL

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#73

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 5:49 PM

Sorry, I already gave the most useless piece of knowledge that I am aware of possessing....but can't resist....

The User Signature posts.

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#76

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 6:01 PM

Every bit of technical information I ever learned; my stupervisor is a Luddite.

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#78

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 8:30 PM

For my part, if a piece of information is interesting, it can't be completely useless. It has, at least, entertainment value, even if I'm the only one who is entertained. (I'm at risk here in my discovering that the foregoing may, in fact, be the most useless fact to anyone else here.) Okay, how's this?

3/4

Wait a minute. 3/4 of what? Uh oh. 3/4 can't be useless! It begs a question!

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#79

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 8:32 PM

Even though the Moon is smaller than the Earth, it is farther away.

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#80
In reply to #79

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/25/2007 9:48 PM

An attempt to get there by ones self is frowned upon:

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#81

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 12:11 AM

In the movie Twister, the instrument package called Dorothy was based on a real device called TOTO.

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#82
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Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 12:35 AM

Toto later went on to write the book, "I, Toto."

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#86
In reply to #82

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 1:17 AM

Be careful if you get a job subtitling films in Hindi. You may get cut.

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#87
In reply to #86

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 1:29 AM

This one has got to be the best and funniest insult in the history of the World...

"There are burnt, dead lizard eggs in the ---- around your ------'s ---."

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#89
In reply to #82

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 9:01 AM

ROFL!

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#93

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 1:02 PM

That my astrological sign is Cancer.

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#94
In reply to #93

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 2:29 PM

I am on the 'cusp' of Cancer. This has the additional merit of being useless and meaningless.

Damn - I added to it. In mitigation, I did not say which side.

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#95

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 3:00 PM

I am slowly losing my hair. Is that useless enough?

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#96

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 3:16 PM

I always thought that the standard for useless was; "tits on a boar hog"

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#97
In reply to #96

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 3:19 PM

That is truly a useless feature on a male swine, but deemed useful as a colloquialism when referring to uselessness.

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#98

Re: Absolutely useless!?

09/26/2007 3:46 PM

I was wondering why, when you have a sneeze coming which refuses to shoot, you look at a bright light, and hey presto, out she fires! Any idea why this happens?

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