Let's talk Avatars! What does your Avatar say about you?

And there was me in awe and rapt attention thinking it was all true...
you've upset me now.. me-now...meow...

Del

You stupid boy...'scurries off giggling' is your old avartar.

You mean..<Bounds of chortling> surely

Del

Now look here Del, I was just googling for an obscure town and I found this !

http://www.diddly-di.fsnet.co.uk/Communication.htm

You've only yourself to blame. < Cackle>

I've never gone 'beating the bounds'. Do they do it up your way ?

The parishioners of St Mary Redcliffe, Bristol walk the length of the pipe that first brought fresh water to that part of the city, from the springs where it starts to the remains of the public fountain and trough at the West End of the church, on Redcliffe Hill.

I think my parish church in Lancashire Beat the Bounds, but I never went with them, so I can't confirm.

Looks like a purely LOCAL conversation to me.

For the rest of us earthlings, looks like the nutcracker has finally been forced into hibernation. What shall we ever do? <somberly wringing hands> However, survive, we must my fellow compatriots. Ever onward, to the Status Quo!

At one time footpaths had to be walked at least once a year, otherwise the farmer/landowner could shut them down. This is different to 'Beating the bounds' and I think the law may have changed. Up in Scotland there is no technical law of 'Trespass' like we have in England. Because I creep around at night in a stripy vest with a bag marked "Swag", such things don't bother me.

Of course, the bag he's talking about is actually a hand bag, and his high heels keep getting stuck in the marsh.

That's true, but my rather fetching arm-wear stops me from sinking. Dolly Parton would have been a natural marsh bandit.

Well come on and fess -up. How many times do I make a prat of myself ! It takes a special kind of talent to **** things up a much as me !

I don't think I can possibly comment!

Anyway...(changes subject quickly) we want the big red horny dude back. I'm fed up of small, cute fluffy things. It really doesn't fit your persona!

IGOR! Barbecue time!

The dude at the desk has 1 vote so far ! This may be enough to swing it, well I don't have a dead cat ! Keep watching..........

I haven't got a calender for the new year yet. It's so easy to loose track - a bit of stress and I loose the blot.

My avatar says I'm a no nonsense kinda vermin... A vermin's vermin! A kick-butt and take names kind a vermin! If Charles Bronson was a vermin, I'd be him...

OK, so sometimes I dress in womens clothing, but that's just to compare against how really manly I am! I'm a red-blooded, two-fisted, he-vermin...

Are you a young boy? Want to meet up? I have candy!!!

My momma warned me about people like you ! Besides, didn't you ever hear that Mr Brosnon was a former East German Gymnast ! You don't get a tache like that without some serious steroids. Have you seen the 'man boobs' on some Brit dart players ? I have news for you - It's all natural !

Have you seen the mustaches on some Russian female gymnasts?

Not close-up , If ya know what I mean !

Oh, come on! You know you've felt dirty in the morning!!! That's why you follow the Olympic circuit!!!

I confess!

Twitchy horns would be good. Dang, one of my other selves is going to have to emerge soon........

Been nagging you for ages to bring back The Boss. We miss him, and as PlbMak says, it's much more you!

My avatar and username sort of go hand in hand...there have been a few variations (including a particular Tudor ship), but I usually return to my ghostly blue one (watch this space next week). No-one really understood the Hellebore (Christmas Rose) I found for the festive season

We all noticed, it's just that we weren't convinced by the 'wearing white' thing !

The white came after Christmas (a wild rose - what's not convincing about that? The Hellebore was purple. See, I knew you weren't paying attention

Oh no, look what just happened to my pants !

Bring back the Boss....or I'll get my pitchfork out!!

My pants are getting increasingly yellow ! Having explained to Andy & all where " Spring Heeled Jack" originates, I may have to change to the other one. I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU WAIT ! <crawls away laughing>

... And I see you like to wear them outside your trousers!

That is when I'm on Bat duty !

After much soul searching, I have decided that what my Avatar says is; - Now you see me, now you don't!

IGOR! To the laboratory!

I have visited here several times and it seems to be "now you don't see me, now you do" just as much. vermins bouncing is much harder to figure out.

"...Having explained to Andy & all where " Spring Heeled Jack" originates..."

Hot news flash, Bubba, "all" didn't include me. My feelers are hurt. Unimaginably sore... I miss the little nut magnet...

Chill, Enviro my Man, I'm sure there were lots of us left out - ignored - ostracised etc (yea me too (mumble mumble)).

Just got to climb above it . Give'm the contempt deserved.

The skwirrel will return eventually, I just have to engage in a bit of devilish fun first.

google evil squirrel

All I recall is some goats and Friday - but it's been about a hundred years since I read the tale... Perhaps the illustrator has morphed it into Swiss Family Crusoe? They had a zoo on their ship, as I recall...

The version of Swiss Family Robinson with John Mills is hilarious. Tigers and all sorts of incongruous animals. He was one hell of a house builder as well. The Admirable Crighton is good for a laugh if you like desert island type films. The Beach is quite good, except I heard they imported loads of sand to make it look more realistic.

Admirable?

You fiendish dwarf !

Smug mode...!

That spell-checker is not ep to mech is it !

Sm.. sm..

Don't bather with spel cheking - we don't rede so gud ennyway...

As out illustrious Oz companion might say, ' Egging hell !'

Godfrey Daniel! That IS a joke, right? I mean, not a serious, for-real newsletter about actual real-life happenings... I mean people who think like that can't actually exist can they? Please tell me you're just having me on here!

Is that site for real?! The quiz was "interesting".

Mind you, they got one thing (!) wrong - Satan is NOT a pagan god. Satan appears in his most recognised form only in the Christian Bible. In the Jewish texts he actually works for Jehovah (see Job). So one of the most definite things we can say about Satanists is that they are not pagans - they are a post-Christian belief group (I hesitate to use the word religion as I don't think they're that organised).

And that's as close as I'm going to get to discussing religion on CR4!!

I will pray that that site is a total hoax, a joke, some kind of fraud.

And that's as close as I'm going to get to discussing religion on CR4!!!

Because there are people (you may not have 'em, but we've a good supply if I may offer to share) who come frighteningly close to that mode. And they're not on the same team as these guys...

Surely you all know of 'The Onion'. After all it's America's finest news source. See for yourselves.........here's 'The Onion'

Please enjoy.

cr3

Yes... it's the Devils' own job to try and organise a bunch of Satanists....

Too right! Tell me about it...

Worse than herding... ...even sleeping ones.

That cat cracks me up. I loved the one where he was abducted by aliens and got 3 wishes. Poor old Freddy !

The trouble with the internet is that it gives every raving loony a platform. I shall now go back and read the site I linked earlier. A couple of lines was enough for me. As my Dad used to exclaim in dismay on occasion " The things you see when you ain't got your shotgun !" ( and that was just in the supermarket).

Spell-checker? Spell-checker? You mean, we have a spell-checker? Doh!

When you reply to this message to tell me what a smart-a%5 I am, look above the screen where you are typing. On the toolbar, neat the right-hand end, there is a small green check-mark with ABC above it. DO NOT GO ANYWHERE NEAR THAT ICON WITH YOUR CURSOR! If you do click on it, it will change the spelling of half the words in your post. Some infernal device I guess...

Right you are - I'll show 'em all the respect they have comin' to 'em!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spring_Heeled_Jack

It's out of date now ! Haahahahahhahah !

Speaking of out of date...

Bob walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.

He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV.

The 10:00 PM news was coming on. The news crew was covering a
story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Bob and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"

Bob says, "You know, I bet he'll jump."

The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."

Bob placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!"

Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the
ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Bob
saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money."

Bob replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5
PM news and so I knew he would jump."

The blond replied, "I did too;

but I didn't think he'd do it again."

ROFLMAO!!! A lawyer friend of mine tells the BEST lawyer jokes.

What do you call a hundred lawyers buried up to their necks in sand?

Not enough sand.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?

One's a slimy, scum-sucking, bottom feeder. The other's a fish.

They may be dated, but they're timeless!

Hahaha! Yes they are.

"It's out of date now"

I guess SO - Victorian England? This guy wreaked havoc from 1827 to 1904! And all this took place in the SAME country that gave us The Royal Society and Oxford...

Egad, sir!

What do you call a brunette sitting between two blondes? An interpreter ! They'd shoot me for that, except it applies equally to men. How are you enjoying our Beckhams ? Will you take a Madonna back ? We could call it some sort of Marshell aid in reverse. Having only just repaid you for WW11 it only seems fair we should add a tip.

The Beckhams?... aww but they're luverleee, she even waved to me once. Nearest thing to Royalty.... What's the closest thing to silver?
We've got a mop at work with a face drawn on it with a felt pen called 'posh' (not the pen...do pay attention Kris) Anyhow I sometimes go into the broom cupboard to give it a snog... (I take 2 tennis balls with me for a treat sometimes)...promise you wont tell the others.

Whoops better go Mrs Cat is watching.

Those blonde brooms are so easily mistaken. Don't tell Mrs Cat what you've been up to. Can we sell them Americans on the idea of a Wayne Rooney ? Gorden Brown is going to be a lot harder, but all things are possible. Catalogue model perhaps ? More like Gordon bloody bennett !

Ah! Are you at all familiar with the film work of W.C. Fields? One of his many euphimistic tag lines was the quite similar "Godfrey Daniel!"

Now, who might Wayne Rooney and Gorden Brown be, then?

Inquiring minds want to know...

Wayne and Gordon must be related - they are both fat b******* who kick everybodies balls. Both could score, but for different reasons. I'm sure it was Kissinger who explained that point.

A tip, eh? Well, the movie "Bend It Like Beckham" was good, but you can keep the originals for all I care (and if you want to add Madonna to the Spice lineup, that's OK by me too - what, Sleazy Spice?) After all, we've got Mia Hamm! My preference would be John Courage, maybe Bass, or if you can talk the Irish out of a supply, Smithwick's would be just fine!

Stick with Bass. Thekestons Old Peculiar is good if you fancy a bad 'morning after'.

Tanglefoot does what it says on the label .

haahahahaha ! At present I have a ladder I borrowed off a mate. I'm keeping it it the hallway for security ( No garage + can't be bothered lugging it to the shed each day). I've tripped over the damn thing so many times ! And that's just on coffee. Somewhere I related the story of how I keeled over drunk whilst a student in Newcastle. My 'friends' decided it would be a larf to nick my clothes and run off. I had to stagger home in just a pair of boots and jacket. I was living in a student halls of residence and the security guys kindly fell apart laughing as I eventually arrived back. I had to walk past enumerable people before I got to the sanctuary of my own room.. I never did tell Brian that I later pissed in his beer glass one night as he visited the 'Gents'. Doing this in a crowded pub without being spotted was quite an accomplishment I thought. It certainly taught him not to drink lager.

"I never did tell Brian..."

Well, not until NOW, anyway... Brian, you there, Brian?

The look on his face was priceless. I did have to sup half a pint of his lager to make room, but it was well worth it. I coudn't give a XXXX as they say.